Belgium Vs. US part One——-The Bachelorette Version

In truly a never-before done 2 parter from ABC/ESPN we get Belgium vs. US the first round tonight. We have Andi and her fellas in Belgium, where they are insulting Belgians by just walking around their country. Hopefully they are so sickened with this display that the US Soccer Team will be able to beat them tomorrow afternoon with no problem!

Why is Andi dressed up as Catwoman in the beginning of the episode? I’m so glad Andi is telling us the history of Brussels and then says that more important than that is the fact that this week is the week before hometowns and everyone knows how important hometowns are, and that means that we have to whittle our group of 6 down to 4.

What the hell is up with all the scarves this season? It’s all about the same hoodies and scarves, or scarves with the hoodies. Chris Harrison comes into the hotel and he looks more masculine than all the rest of the guys combined, in his tight v-neck t-shirt and blazer, which I’m pretty sure he must have stole from Cody before he went home last week.

I’m too busy staring at the scarves of Nick, Farmer Chris and Marcus and Nick’s scarf is so intense that there is no way I can master how to tie that thing, so more power to him for being able to tie it like that I guess. We all know that I love Marcus, but it’s bad when I”m looking at Marcus’ bright pink t-shirt and scarf and I’m jealous of the outfit and wondering if I could pull it off like him. Go back to the hoodies san scarf Marcus!!!

Oh look, I’m distracted by the horrible outfits, by Nick talking smack and saying that he’s the winner and all the rest of the guys should go home now. Nick is wanting another one-on-one date with Andi, though he got the one-on-one last week. Nick also finds it hard for Andi to go out with Marcus when she’s gonna end up with Nick, and he sounds very sinister and scary! Marcus’ name gets read to get the one-on-one date, and Josh decides to cuss when his name is read.

Marcus and Andi walk around the market and Andi said that she’s liked Marcus from the start, but has been putting off getting really close to him because he told her that he’d contemplated leaving, so now she’s worried he’s not going to stick around through thick and thin. Marcus has his journal and has been looking back on it. Evidently it has a bunch of Andi in it. Marcus said that he was going to leave, because he was scared of his feelings for her because he’s never felt what he’s felt for her so quickly. And he said he loves her and it’s full throttle from here and she seems smitten by it. And she’s going to break poor Marcus’ heart, but hopefully he can be the new Bachelor and I’ll get to see more of him.

How sad is it that he says he loves her, kisses her, and this is the first date that he felt like she was his girlfriend?!? I gotta give the Bachelorette credit, I think they’ve heard people complaining that we never see the people eat on the date, so poor Marcus and Andi had to stuff themselves full of food, so we wouldn’t be able to complain about that anymore.

Hmmm…telling Andi how he feels about her is easier than talking about Marcus’ family, which now has me really intrigued, since I don’t know if I know Marcus’ family story, so I really wanna know what’s going on with his family. If we make it to his hometown we’ll go to his sister’s house. Meet his mom, brother, sister and niece and nephew. Dad doesn’t play a role in his life. Marcus saw his suitcases packed, and in another heart-breaking moment from this season, he says: “I don’t know if I’ll ever know why he left and why he blamed my mom and I.” And I’m screaming at my TV, that he’s a great guy, and I don’t care if Andi doesn’t have a rose to give out on this date, she needs to find one and give it to him right now!

She does say that it’s not his fault. Marcus said he has abandonment issues because of that and he wanted her to know that he won’t be meeting his dad. Andi handles it with grace when she said she’s not going to let someone choosing to not be there effect her.

Then she finally turns it around to something more positive and asks him what kinda questions her mom will ask Andi. You can see how much Marcus loves his mom, by just thinking of his mom, he looks up and has a smirk on his face. Marcus’ mom will ask about Andi’s childhood. Which in typical deflecting Andi move, she then asks about what Marcus’ mom would say about his childhood.

Well, there went the positive spin on the conversation, Marcus said that his mom will admit she wasn’t the best mom, but he defends her by saying she did the best she could, with what she was given. Marcus’ grandparents were very strict and wanted the best in her but beat that into her. It seems that his mom did the same thing to Marcus and his sibling. He admits it was scary at times and he tried his best to stay outta the house. He said it was a dysfunctional relationship in his late teens/early twenties, but since then they’ve worked through it. With lots of tears between them. Now they have coffee every week and he sees his sister almost daily.

She said that she knows more about him now then she knows about many other people in her life, because he’s so open and willing to share. He said it needs to be a two way street so she can share too. Andi said there is no doubt in her mind that Marcus is going to be a great husband and father some day. Andi said that there is no rose on the date, but she’s excited to meet Marcus’ family. Then we get lots of him telling her he loves her, and making out.

Question: how many times are we going to hear Andi say “This is a man?” I think she said it about Brian, Nick and now Marcus.

Date card is at the hotel: Josh gets the one-on-one date and everyone thought that it was going to be a group date. Dylan is pissed that Josh gets a one-on-one date since he just had one a week and a half ago in France.

Before we can go to Josh’s date, we have Marcus come back into the hotel, and Nick said you can tell that Marcus had a great time and has some confidence and he doesn’t want to hear it. Nick can’t handle listening to Marcus talk about his date, so he somehow “sneaks” out, considering the guys were sitting in that main room of the suite, I don’t know how he did it. But he does it, goes down to the lobby and tells the girl at the front desk that he locked himself out of his hotel room and doesn’t remember what his room number is, he said it’s under his wife’s name: Andi Dorfman. And she ends up handing him a copy of her key and said room 207!

And Nick is officially a creeper for being able to do this! He finds her room and knocks on the door. She wonders if everything is okay, he said yes, and then everything is great. He gets in the hotel room, she’s still in her cocktail dress from Marcus’ date, and she needs to change and goes for a walk with Nick outside. They break the rules, and Andi feels a slight feeling of guilt but gets over it quickly. Though didn’t she freak out when Clare did this with Juan Pablo last season?!?!? HYPOCRITE!!!!!!!!!

They sit in an outside cafe, and they hold hands, and each have their hand on their face, and he does in for a kiss, and I’m super confused, because Andi said the word that she’d use to describe her and Nick’s relationship is “Passionate?!?!” and it’s hot, because when he kisses her she can tell what he’s thinking and feeling, and I do not think that is the case.

When Nick said that this is a night that he won’t forget in Brussels in his interview, and he smirks at the camera, I feel like he’s being so manipulative, that it makes me so angry! I am now feeling bad for Josh, because he’s the one getting the bad reputation as being the player and we think he’s too good to be true, when in reality, Andi’s gonna get her heartbroken from Nick!

We’re onto Josh & Andi’s one-on-one date and I see Andi’s scarf and I’m thinking she should’ve worn this outfit on the group date, as some of the guys could’ve given her better advice on how to wear that scarf, as I feel like it’s wearing her and she’s not wearing that. They are going to explore Ghent, Belgium.

Andi wants Josh to tell her what emotions he’s feeling for her, as she’s sure he’s never gone on a bad date in his life. Andi and Josh get to watch the goose parade come by, and Josh handles it so great. He starts giggling, just as much as my sister and I do at home. He’s loving it, and he starts marching behind the geece with her. I don’t see Nick doing the same thing in that situation.

Andi asks how excited he is to tell his family where he’s been and he said he’s the most excited to see his family. Josh admits that it’s hard for him to be vulnerable and share where he’s coming from. And Andi gets mad that he’s not being more open….however, isn’t that normal for people to not declare their love right away. That would scare you (I still love you Marcus!) I just think Josh is progressing at a normal rate, and that’s evidently not good enough for her, though that’s how she is progressing, she’s not telling these guys ANYTHING about her, yet she wants the world on her silver platter!

Josh and Andi are having dinner at a castle. Andi said that Marcus & Nick are willing to get married right now and she doesn’t know if Josh is at that point. She needs to know what’s going on in his head and if she doesn’t she’s not going to his hometown.

Josh admits he gets jealous on group dates and doesn’t like her talking to other guys. I like Josh because he calls her out on her stuff. He said that they over-analyze things and that it’s not a too good to be true thing.

Okay, so sorry to be beating this dead horse, but seriously, did we have a wardrobe person on staff this season? I’ve not missed Marquel as much as I do this episode with the horrible wardrobe choices. We are going to have the last group date card read, and there is Dylan sitting on the couch, wearing as my sister called them “Tickle me pink” pants, a black 3/4 shirt and his hair in a half-ponytail, again a style choice that I would consider for myself, but not for a fella. Nick is wearing a picnic table cloth for a shirt and Brian and Chris are wearing normal clothes!

Once Brian, Chris and Nick’s names are read, he says: “I cannot wait to never have to do this again, I’m excited to see Andi, I’m excited for the date, and excited I never have to do this again, ever again.” Nick feels like the group date rose is his to lose on the date, and no one else belongs with Andi but him.

Andi is now asking Josh what his mom is going to ask her. Josh said that his dad is going to grill him more than he’s going to grill Andi. She prods him a little bit to ask him what he’s going to say about his feelings for her. At first I thought he was going to do a good job of skirting the issue, when he said he’ll tell his parents the truth about his feelings, and then he goes for it and says: “I’m falling in love with you.” Which has her gasp, and she’d been leaning her head on the couch, but no more, she’s completely enthralled now! And she’s giddy and grinning like an idiot at him and she tells him she’s comforted by his feelings. He said he doesn’t say “love” lightly, and he only says it to someone he’d think about marrying. We get lots of them making out, and of course a concert from America Young, where it’s not a private concert, but we do have a private stage to dance on and make-out in-front of a crowd.

As Andi said after 7 weeks he FINALLY says he loves her! Think of what your poor BFF Nikki feels like Andi. She’s still waiting for Juan Pablo to tell her he loves her and they’ve been dating 7 months! Andi said she’ll never forget today.

Group date time! Don’t worry Andi is wearing a scarf as is Nick, we’ve got Dylan in a hoodie and Farmer Chris in the blazer/jacket. Brian is in the v-neck long-sleeve shirt with a hood attached to it. Brian said he’s going to have blinders on and forget about the other guys, which you know is code for the fact that he won’t.

We’re on a rail-bike. Which is basically the 4 of the guys pedaling bikes, as their is a cart that Andi is just sitting on in the middle of the guys. They’re exercising and not sweating nearly as much as I would’ve been, had it been me! We’re at an Abbey and monastery. Andi said the one rule is that there is no kissing in the walls. They are on sacred ground and should be respecting.

Farmer Chris and Andi get to do some pottery. Andi is excited that Farmer Chris is the secret admirer. We get to re-enact the famous scene from Ghost and Farmer Chris goes for the kiss, we better be outside the walls, since they are certainly kissing! They put the clay all over each other faces. Andi asks Farmer Chris if he thinks she’s always prissy. I love the fact that Farmer Chris just said that he’s a nervous Nancy 🙂

We hear that whoever gets the rose is going to be handed the rose at the beginning of the afternoon and the other 3 guys are going back to the hotel while her and the lucky guy with the rose get the date.

Coach Brian is getting flustered with Nick and said that he knows that Nick is smarter than him, but he’s tired of him talking about strategy. Oh no, Coach Brian is putting all of his eggs in one basket! He goes with the “I’m falling in love with you,” and he has never said those words to anyone. She certainly doesn’t react the same way with Coach as she does when Josh told her the same thing.

Nick is driving me insane! He’s not nervous about hometowns and he is playing her like a fiddle. It drives me crazy, as we watched him play the manipulative card. He’s cocky, but then he gets around her and he plays so coy, sly and innocent and I feel bad for Andi that she can’t see through that. Isn’t she a District Attorney, shouldn’t she see through these things and see a liar?

Nick gets the date on the group date, and I don’t think anyone is that shocked. Of course Nick takes it to the extreme by saying that by her giving him this rose, she said she loves him….no it said that she’s stupid and can’t see through you! Does Nick realize that even though he’s getting a hometown, so are 3 other guys?!? She’s going to spend time with 3 other guys.

Farmer Chris, Coach Brian and Dylan are pissed. They also have to squeeze into the smallest backseat known to man. There is lots of bleeps and curse words. Farmer Chris said that he would be holding his head up high if it’d be any other guy besides Nick who would’ve gotten the one on one time. Nick and Andi are having dinner and I’m SO OVER the 2 of them!

The other 3 walk into the hotel room and Josh & Marcus are in the hotel room, and you can see Josh counting them when they walk in and you see the light bulb come on when they realize Nick isn’t there. Then Josh brings up something very interesting when he said that Nick knows every season in and out. He has a game-plan. Of course I feel like at this point I know the “formula” of the show and know how to act to progress through the season, so that’s the game that Nick is playing.

Marcus said that Nick is going to be one of the last 2 but he’s going to walk away. Marcus said he doesn’t want to be the last guy here, he wants to walk away, and OH MY GOD, that’s EXACTLY IT! It all makes sense!!!!! Nick wants to be dramatic! He wants to leave Andi in tears! Dylan also said that every time they’re in a new country Nick is dissecting the country and figuring out exactly what’s going to happen in the country. He’s playing Andi so much! Andi has a surprise for Nick, and is it true, it’s the first fireworks show of the season?!? And in typical Bachelor fashion, we have this huge fireworks show and Nick and Andi are too busy devouring one another’s faces to enjoy the show.

Back at the hotel, the guys are still mad. They’re saying Nick’s a smart guy and the guys are tired of game playing. And of course Nick comes in while the guys are all around and you could cut the tension with a knife. I have no clue where Dylan is, as he’s the only guy missing. Josh is hacking up a lung, and other than that it’s silent, church bells start chiming and Marcus giggles.

Coach Brian breaks the silence and said he’s tired of the crap that Nick is pulling. Marcus said Nick gets in people’s heads and he prey’s on insecurities for the guys. Marcus said he wouldn’t trust his sister within Nick’s striking distance. Farmer Chris calls Nick out by saying that he talks more about strategy then he ever talks about Andi. Farmer Chris said Nick goes way too deep in the strategy and figures out who’s going to be on the date card.

Nick decides to go on the defensive and play the victim and that they’re all saying things that are un-true, which would be a good strategy move, as he’s had to see this move before in seasons past, ie: Clare! Marcus said it best, Nick is a douche-bag!

We’re onto the rose ceremony and who’s families Andi wants to meet! Okay, and to stay on my I hate the wardrobe in this episode, I can’t stand Andi’s dress. I feel as if magnets are attracted to her dress and just get stuck to it.

Dylan talks to Farmer Chris that it’s between Dylan, Farmer Chris and Coach Brian. They think that Josh and Marcus are guaranteed the roses.

Farmer Chris talks about how they’re going to Northeast Iowa if we’re going to Farmer Chris’ house. Farmer Chris tells Andi that he’s falling in love with her. Iowa has been a big part of Farmer Chris’ life and he wants to share that with her.

Dylan talks to Andi, and she can’t make eye contact with him and you can tell that she’s just not into that.

Coach Brian is talking about his hometown date and where they would go and Nick comes in and ruins their moment and I’m pissed!

Nick had a tough night and he’s tired to say goodbye to the guys. He said he’s tired of talking about Andi being out with other guys. He talks about the target on his back, with the rose on his lapel. He’s excited for his friends and family to meet Andi and then he busts out some fake tears to talk about how he feels about her.

Farmer Chris swoops in at the last minute before the cocktail party is going to be over, and he takes her outside away from everyone, and Farmer Chris goes for the kiss, and she tells the camera “You Go Farmer!”

Okay, rose ceremony time!

1. Nick already has a rose———-YUCK!!!!!!

2. Josh——woot woot!!!!!!

3. Marcus——-ahhhhhh yeah!!!!!!!!!

4. Farmer Chris———-Between being the secret admirer and the last kiss he just planted on her, he did well!

That means we’re saying goodbye to Dylan and Coach Brian.

Dylan, you’ve had such a tough life, but you deserve better than this. Don’t give up, you will find love! His tears make me really sad, and I’m glad that he said he deserves to fall in love again, because he certainly does. Somebody please give Dylan a hug!

Coach Brian is leaving, and I can hear your sobs from here Heidi. I’m glad that Brian is not a crier but is more angry and frustrated. He’s going to give his all to the girl that he falls in love with and we know you will Brian! You’ll find someone much better than Andi, he’s bitter and angry and now the tears come out! Of course who would’ve thought that Brian is afraid of pickles?!? He’s legitimately flipping out, over pickles!

Andi is cheering to hometowns next week! We also see where they find out about Eric’s passing, which will be interesting to see how that is handled.

I’m hoping that Nick is going to be leaving us next week, but seeing the preview of Farmer Chris, I don’t think it bodes well for him! Well Heidi, hopefully you’ll see Coach Brian on Bachelors in Paradise and all will be okay!

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