Good evening Bachelor-watchers!
Man, after a snowy weekend, what is better than having the Bachelor on our screens to heat us back up! We’re living the mansion! We’re off to New Mexico! And Chris is excited to fall in love and he’s gonna find it at the hot air balloon festival, while the girls are in LA!
Oh Megan….thinks she’s gonna see beaches and sombreros everywhere she goes in New Mexico, I mean that makes sense since she’s leaving the country for the first time. I’m already rolling my eyes and we’er literally 2 minutes in! Which means Ashley I. needs to get on my screen and tell us that she’s still a virgin and wants to have ANOTHER conversation about it.
Carly gets the one-on-one date “Let’s come together” and she’s ecstatic and the girls are pissed it’s her! Carly is still over the moon when she goes running up to see him and jumps into his arms. Carly watch out girl, it sounds like Farmer Chris has you in the friend-zone and it’s up to you to convince him of otherwise!
Carly & Chris are in the backyard and come across a lady meditating by the eternity pool. The lady is about the most opposite as Carly. She’s cool calm and collected. The lady tells us that she’s going to bring more juiciness to the relationship. Chris wants the love guru to bring out the intimacy and if she can’t they have no hope!
As the love guru is doing her work, Chris is always about two seconds away from absolutely cracking up. He feels nothing and probably feels as ridiculous as it looks. Chris is now blindfolded and she’s not allowed to use her voice. She’s gonna use her breath and just touch him as the love guru watches and gives instructions and all of America. You can tell Carly feels somewhat uncomfortable with this as does Chris.
We’re into the “derobing” part of the date and Carly tells us that she hasn’t undressed in-front of a buy in a while and reminds us that this is a first date and NATIONAL TELEVISION AUDIENCE is watching! So of course it’s awkward, the have someone telling them what to do and neither of them want to do this. Finally Carly is the one to tell us that she’s feeling uncomfortable and Chris admits that he is too. They keep their pants on as the love guru so eloquently puts and they tell us the masks they’re willing to let go are for Chris the ability to completely open up. Carly tells us that her fear is that she doesn’t feel worthy of love. And now I’m hitting my head up against the couch, because that’s the nail in her proverbially coffin. She’s going to get dumped, and is gonna be a mess and feel like she doesn’t deserve love!
Okay, the last part of the exercise is that Carly needs to straddle Chris’ lap. They are nose to nose and the only rule is no kissing. They’re supposed to breath each other in. Love guru gives us examples of the deep breaths they should be taking. I’m still feeling uncomfortable and hoping that many Altoids were given out on this date! They then have to look into each others eyes and “thank each other” however they feel comfortable which of course means making out in-front of the love guru!
Kelsey is now telling the girls back at the hotel about her husband and how she’s a widow. Of course she’s telling Ashley and Mackenzie about this and Ashley thinks it’s not real because she’s had this hidden for 5 weeks. She used to be someone’s whole world and was the most special person to someone and that’s what’s making this process so hard. She’s been a widow for 1.5 years now.
Group date time!
Jade, Megan, Kaitlyn, Whitney, Mackenzie, Becca, Samantha, Ashley I and Kelsey “I’m rapidly falling in love”
Back to Carly and Chris’ date. Carly told him that it was like date 7 instead of date 1. Carly was most looking forward to this portion of the date instead of the beginning portion. Her old boyfriend and her dated for 2 years and evidently the ex didn’t want to do anything physical with her and made her feel not beautiful and undesired which makes me sad. Especially when she says that she’s not pretty, because I think she’s quite gorgeous!
Chris gives her all the compliments of how pretty she is and smart and he loves her sense of humor. Then she’s smart and puts the question back on him and why he struggles in opening up. She actually listens to him and puts him on the spot which is refreshing. He says that he’s concerned that what he does isn’t good enough for some of the girls and she puts it right back and asks if he thinks that someone will get to the Farm and not want to be there and he said that could be a real possibility. To which I say, get rid of those girls Chris! Carly gets the rose! Chris said he’d be lucky if he could spend every day with her and if she were his wife!
Alright group date time! We’re going white water rafting! And most of these girls are not in appropriate attire for said adventure. The guy comes and gives them the safety talk to tell them that they are risking their lives, which is very dramatic. Surprise, surprise Ashley got herself on Chris’ boat. Whitney is right next to him and he likes that.
Jade goes overboard and is pretty dramatic that she saw her life flash before her eyes. She may not do well because she hates cold. She evidently goes into hypothermia in normal weather, which tells me she’s not a true Nebraska girl 🙂 All the girls are wishing they would’ve done the same thing. Kelsey is waving her freak flag by saying she’s fine so she won’t get any special attention.
We’re now in a hotel for the evening portion! Whitney reminds us that time is the biggest thing about this competition. As Chris is walking through the lobby, he’s stopped by Jordan in the lobby. Jordan who he eliminated in week 2. She drove here and has been thinking about it and realized she shouldn’t have spent all her time drinking and getting drunk instead of opening up to him.
Chris tells us that the reason he sent Jordan home is because he didn’t think she was taking it seriously. However, this Jordan is different than the one he sent home. All the girls are freaking out wondering where Chris is at and if they’re getting stood up or not. Then Chris comes around the corner and he’s arm-in-arm with another girl and they’re all freaking out wondering who it is and then when they realize it’s Jordan they’re really freaking out! None of the girls are happy to see her!
Ashley and Chris get their alone time first. And Ashley yet again is showing us how lady-like and virgin-like she is. She’s wearing a white dress. Oh excuse me, it’s more of a slip than a dress. I like that we see Ashley going to sit down and the first thing Chris is doing is standing over her and he has the blanket ready to go and is covering up her legs before she has a chance to show him anything!
Well Ashley hates Jordan the most out of any of the girls in the house. Because we know that Ashley is a lady and Jordan is not. They are so fundamentally different, because Jordan is a party-girl and Ashley is not. Ashley thinks that Jordan will grow-up someday and be a good marriage material girl like her someday but it’s not right now.
Becca is sitting down with him and asking him what his thoughts are. He tells her that he’s concerned with the girls thoughts (read into that HER thoughts). She wins already because she spins it to make sure she tells him her thoughts where she was happy to see Jordan at first and then had a sinking feeling because she realized that it added numbers. However, here’s the kicker, she trusts him to make good choices and respects his decision! I’m more and more team Becca, I think she’s my front-runner!
Kelsey is shocked and blindsided and what happens tonight is now making her question her relationship with him and all of his relationships.
Ashley said top 11 is when we need to start being selfish! Ashley is turning into a total Regina George! She’s bullying Whitney into telling her that we’re not gonna be nice to Jordan at all! Why would they smile and be nice to her! Solidarity into being mean girls! We wear pink on Wednesdays!
Whitney puts it best when she says she’s flabbergasted by the girls and doesn’t think that Chris would condone blatantly being mean to someone. You don’t have to like everyone, but you shouldn’t go out of your way to be rude and mean to someone!
Jade and him have a good conversation as well. Where she also respects his decision and said that this is a hard decision and environment for her and she doesn’t know how it’s going to change.
Carly and Britt are hanging out in the hotel and Britt tells us that she’s going to shower because the one-on-one date card is here. And she’s thinking about washing her hair. Carly then tells us that evidently Britt doesn’t shower and hasn’t showered in weeks. Which is quite frightening. Especially because wasn’t she on that muddy obstacle course last week and two weeks ago wasn’t she in the wrestling pigs challenge? I mean come on Britt! What else do you have going on that you’re not showering? It’s not like you’re Netflix binge watching/working/on social media, all you literally have is uninterrupted time. Get in the shower for a half hour each day to get away from the crazies and get some alone time!
Well her date card said “Britt, the sky’s the limit” and Britt is literally in tears. She hates heights so much that she can’t handle it. Man up Britt! I hate heights too, TRUST ME! However, I’d save the tears and freaking out until at least the day of the date and probably the location of the date, if you’re freaking out this much now you’re gonna be in lots of trouble. Start drinking lots now!
Back to the tense group date! Chris is taking Jordan back outside. He said that he can’t keep her because it’s not fair to the girls. It has nothing to do with how he feels about her, it’s all about the girls and his responsibility to them. She is gracious and said she wants to have no regrets and gives him compliments on his integrity as a man. They hug it out and get closure!
Ashley is attacking Whitney again and as she’s yelling at her that Jordan had plenty of opportunities to prove herself, in walk Jordan and Chris. Jordan hugs all the girls goodbye again.
We still have a rose to give out on the date! Chris is giving the rose to a girl who has a way of making him feel special and is here for the right reasons. Whitney gets the rose and I’m happy with that choice!
Ashley is in tears as Whitney gets the rose. Since Ashley doesn’t think she’s a threat and has been thinking that the whole day. Ashley is complaining to Mackenzie and finally Mackenzie said we like Whitney, we can’t hate everyone. Ashley said that Whitney hates her and she doesn’t know why. She’s fine being a mean girl as long as Chris keeps her around!
Oh it’s the date where Chris goes into the hotel room and wakes up Britt and the other girls to get Britt. Britt has make-up on. Carly tells us that Britt puts on makeup just in-case every night before she goes to bed. Which is proven to be true when she has on her pink lipstick and glittery eye-shadow. She has 5 minutes to get ready and all the girls are pissed!
They pull up and they’re gonna go up in a hot air balloon. She’s all of a sudden over her fear of heights. I’m sorry, but as someone who’s terrified of heights, yes you can over-come it but you’re not all of a sudden gonna be all smiles and happy to get up in the air. You’re still gonna terrified and not overly eager to get up in the air. I don’t think Britt is as genuine as she’s trying to appear to be either. And that makes me quite sad. Chris is smitten with her and has been since the first impression rose and I think he’ll continue to be smitten until top 4 or 5 at least.
Chris takes her back to his suite as the girls are all making fun of Britt for not showering and sleeping in her makeup. Chris and Britt are on the bed and she’s jumping on it.Then he takes her out of the bedroom and into the parlor room and they sit on the loveseat.
Britt evidently told Ashley and Megan when they were talking about how they’re ultimate dream is to get married and have kids she didn’t understand that. Since she loves being single. She doesn’t want to have kids for a long time. And now all the girls are pissed and think Britt’s not here for the right reasons.
I think that Britt is like our opera singer Sharleen from Juan Pablo’s season. They both got the first impression rose and they both don’t seem into the whole mom and wife thing.
Carly tells us that on a scale from 1 to manipulative she’s beyond manipulative.
Britt then tells Chris that she wants 100 kids because he said that he wants as many as possible kids. He gives her the rose and then tells her that the date isn’t over. As Britt told us the date started in bed and ended in bed. We then scan over and see them making out under the covers and then Chris shuts the bedroom doors on us.
CHRISTOPHER CHRISTOPHER CHRISTOPHER!!!! I’m so disappointed in you!
Britt comes back and tells the girls that they ordered room service and had coffee and dessert and then ended up taking a two hour nap. And that is when you see girls hearts breaking with that revelation.
Kelsey decides she needs to be the one to pay Chris a surprise visit this season. She comes to the hotel room and tells him that other girls don’t know that she’s here. Kelsey tells us the story of her and Sanderson Poe. They met at 19, dated for 3 months and knew they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together. He died in May 2013 from walking to work and having heart failure. She gets a little misty-eyed but is able to get thru her story. He gives her a big hug.
Up there for most awkward cut-away interview shots as to be Kelsey telling us “Isn’t my story AMAZING? I mean yes it’s tragic, but it’s Amazing! I love my story!” Also ABC has creepy music playing as she tells us that.
Then as Chris is giving her a hug she goes in for the kiss and they start making out. She had to have her first kiss and make their relationship move on.
Kelsey tells us that yes this is a story about Chris but this is her story too. It’s her story about picking up her pieces and getting through her challenges. Hell yes she’s getting a rose tonight. You need to stay tuned Monday night at 8s to watch the love story unfold.
And now I’m without a shadow of a doubt team Becca, with Becca close behind and I think Kelsey is insane!
Okay, rose ceremony night! Ashley is telling us yet again how unfair things are and that Britt got private time that no one else has gotten and it’s not fair. Panic is setting in! Whitney is calling Kelsey out, for being confident when even she who has a rose is feeling tense.
Chris breaks the news to the girls that he’d talked with Kelsey today! Didn’t he remember her telling him that the girls didn’t know that they’d been together! Chris tells us that things hit home after Kelsey’s conversation with him and he’s emotional and had to walk out the door.
He walks out the door and they bring Chris Harrison in to counsel him! Carly is cracking me up and I’m enjoying her. She tells us that the cocktail party is revolving around Kelsey because she was going to go home tonight, but she went and had this conversation with Chris so now she’s not gonna go home but another girl is going to.
Kelsey tells the girls she was going to tell them about her time with Chris but she didn’t want to make them feel uncomfortable about the time she had with them that they didn’t. Whitney tells us she knows Kelsey wasn’t gonna tell them. Kelsey tells the girls she had to respect her story and let Chris hear about it. Britt is nodding this whole time, and has her arm around Kelsey and I’m just rolling my eyes, as I’m not team Britt or team Kelsey now so it makes sense they’re on the same team!
Chris is talking about time counting. Kelsey said that he knows what he needs to do and he just needs to do it. The girls kinda call her out and ask what she means by that.Kelsey said that he already has his choice made, he just needs to announce it.
Kelsey is crying more telling the girls that time is important and he’s not to going waste their time. Every day is a gift. I kinda expect Britt to yell out “PREACH” but she doesn’t. She just keeps rubbing Kelsey’s shoulder and nodding. Kelsey is crying telling us that she knows she’s gonna have to say goodbye to some people tonight. And goodbyes are hard. She knows she’s not leaving (CUE OPEN MOUTH DAGGERS sent her way) oh excuse me she doesn’t know if she’s going.
All the girls are talking about how they are going to get time with him before the rose ceremony, which of course means that we’re not having a cocktail party, we’re going straight to the rose ceremony! Which is not shocking to those of us that are fans of the show, but the girls are shocked!
Kelsey is scared that since her story made Chris cancel a cocktail party she doesn’t know what that means. All the girls are wondering what’s going on. We all of a sudden hear gasps and tears. Kelsey is on the ground in the hallway and the medic is asking if she hit her head and asking her name. She can’t catch her breath and tells the medic that she’s having a panic attack.
How horrible of a person am I when I question if that’s real, or if it’s a last ditch attempt to get attention and make sure she gets the sympathy rose? I hope that it’s real and that she gets it taken care of and she’s not as psycho as she appears, but oh my gosh!
And of course we go to a black screen with “TO BE CONTINUED” written on it.
All we see in the previews is lots of tears for next week. More shock and awe. Britt & Chris are running away and girls are pissed. We get the promise of a 2 on 1 date and I think Ashley may be on that date. And it’s supposed to be the most crazy 2 on 1 date ever, so I wonder if it’s Ashley and Kaitlyn or Ashley and Mack? I feel like it has to be 2 friends.
Well until next week!