Ben’s Girls go back to “Bachelor High”

I’m so sorry for the delay in the blog! I struggle once a year it seems where my tomboy fights with my mean girl. The tomboy won and I watched the National Championship last night, so the mean girl and my DVR are watching the Bachelor tonight!

I’ve gotta admit I’m sad that we don’t pick up on Lace and Ben arguing when we jump into the start of the show. We see the girls toasting with “orange juice” but let’s be honest, we all know those are mimosas. Lord knows you need some alcohol to be around 20+ crazies! No judging here, just honesty!

We see the girls in their room and around the house all talking about how perfect Ben is! It looks as if they’ve disinfected a little bit since Bachelor Pad was there as they have new bunk beds in the house.

We get a picture of Ben telling us how excited he is to be the Bachelor and how awesome the first night was. Evidently the Producers want us to know how amazing he is, but also that he’s human and puts his pants on one leg at a time as we get an extreme close-up of him putting on jeans. Something that the majority of us do every single day of our lives, but thanks ABC for making it look like an extraordinary thing.

Lace tells us she was “emotional” on the first night and that wasn’t her. Emotional aka drunk as a skunk! Hopefully she sticks to the virgin drinks and we get to know the real her!

Alright, we’re not messing around! First date card is here and the girls going on it are:

  1. Jackie—girl who gave him the save the date as her intro
  2. LB—short fuchsia cocktail dress one of the only brunettes!
  3. Lauren H—-kindergartner teacher, the super classy one who was talking to Ben when Becca walked in and she let them talk.
  4. Becca—-my favorite! The level-headed, moral, nice girl
  5. Amber—15 min of fame girl who came back with Becca and no one knows her
  6. Mandi—-CRAZY dentist
  7. JoJo—-she wore the unicorn head, but also played the fun charades game
  8. Jubilee—the one who will kick everyone’s a$$ if we don’t watch out
  9. Jennifer—-Jen & Ben, Bennifer, needs more original content
  10. Lace—-Ben never makes eye contact with her, she never loses eye contact with her wine glass!

The date card said “Let’s learn how to love.”

Foreshadowing alert! Lace says she’s not a crazy girl and is in love with Ben. She’s planning on getting the rose and then the ring on this date, so this is gonna be a big night and a boring season evidently!

Alright, first date of the season and we’re at Bachelor High!

bachelor high

Ben wants everyone to be fun and goofy! Ben wants to relive his glory days of high school, and wants the girls to join him. Our principal is Chris Harrison who is looking very snazzy and not like the the dapper Harrison we’re used to seeing. But Ben just said we’re all about goofy and fun, so Harrison is playin along!

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Harrison tells us that we’re splitting the 10 girls into teams of 2. They’re going to 4 different classes and at the end of class a pair will be eliminated until we get to the final two, than one of them will be Ben’s Homecoming Queen. Even though this is a reality dating tv show, we have these girls acting as if he just said they’ll be crowned Miss America, which I guess since Harrison hosts that maybe it is the same thing. I’m just afraid we’re bringing up high school rejection in the midst of reality television rejection, make sure alcohol and a professional are close by!

They split up into pairs and go sprinting to find their lockers.

Our pairs are:

  • Lace/Jubilee—whole lots of crazy! Watch out! They are also the first team eliminated. Ironically enough when they were trying to get “Ben’s Volcano to Erupt” they couldn’t find the Communication ingredient to make it explode.
  • Jackie/Lauren—-they were eliminated when they had to go bobbing for the red apple to put on the lunch tray. Will someone please tell Harrison that lunch is not a class. Jackie was distracted when Ben was attempting to be encouraging while she was bobbing for apples, which I don’t care who are that is not the most attractive activity in the world!
  • Becca/JoJo—have NO CLUE where Indiana is. Lauren H. is making fun of them in her interview saying her Kindergartners would know where it is, but she’s from Michigan and they’re from the West Coast. I know I’d have issues if I had to go with some of those smaller East Coast states. Of course I know the difference between Pennsylvania and Indiana. Ben looked pained to tell them they were out.
  • LB/Jennifer—they are going to Gym class next and all that needs to be done is you each need to hit a free throw. The first team that has both hit a free throw moves on. The way they’re missing I felt as if I were missing a critical piece of info, but no, they are just that bad at it!
  • Amber/Mandi—they FINALLY make free throws. However, there can never be 2 Homecoming Queens, imagine the horror! So the two of them have to run around the track and clear hurdles. Mandi is running barefoot in an outfit more fit for the bar scene than a track and she runs thru the banner and into Ben’s arms.

Ben doesn’t necessarily seem thrilled that Mandi is his Homecoming Queen. He keeps pointing out that it’s exactly LIKE his high school letterman jacket and sash, but it’s not. Of course we’re with the crazy girls, so they don’t hear the imperative word and are either super jealous that they didn’t win and get to wear HIS letterman jacket, or Mandi who is thrilled she did. HELLO, no one is wearing his letterman jacket! It’s still hanging in his closet at his parents house like most high school letterman jackets!

Okay, we’re done with “Bachelor High’ and are now onto the night portion of the date where we’re at a rooftop patio.

Becca grabs Ben first and takes him off to the side. She shows the game she has by taking him to a basketball court so they can talk. By doing so, she shows she can dribble and she nonchalantly shoots the ball and it goes in with no problem. By doing this, it’s a subtle sign that she knows basketball is important to him, and she’s not like the other yahoos and knows how to get the ball through the hoop. It’s a very little thing, but it catches him off guard and he pauses before he can finish asking her a question.

She asks him how it is going. He says great and tells her that he has a million questions for her. Basically why is she here again to go thru this craziness. She says she’s excited to be here and wouldn’t be here if she weren’t excited.

They are just playing ball and he completely air balls one shot and is mortified and then blames his dress shirt. She teases him by saying he can take off his shirt if that would make him feel better.

There is definitely an attraction between the two of them. They both have the goofy grins. He has his hand on her leg, she has her hand on his arm. He’s still trying to process how she’s here and admits he couldn’t believe it the first night. She tells him that she wanted to meet him. She was nervous and wanted to know what his reaction was going to be. She thanks him for making her feel comfortable. She talks about last time with Farmer Chris and how she was scared to open up to the possibility of being hurt and now she’s all in. I do have to admit from my biased self that she does seem to be more comfortable and at ease around Ben, way more so than she was with Farmer Chris.

And we have the first kiss of the season!!! No, not with my girl Becca. It’s with Jen and I was staring at her trying to figure out who in the world she was. Ben told her he really enjoyed their talk the other night, she said she thinks something could be there, and boom all of a sudden he very smoothly went in for the kiss! Maybe Bennifer 3.0 will be a real thing! The girls asked if they kissed when came back and she said yes and if looks could kill, Jen would be no more!

Back to the house we have a date-card showing up! Olivia tells us that she’s obviously the front-runner and then gives us this face, because this is the attractive face of the front-runner. Come on Olivia, you’re a news anchor!!!! Act like you’ve been here before!!!

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Caila gets to join Ben on a date of surprises. She is so cute and smiley! She does a dorky little happy dance and is super excited. Olivia is shooting daggers at her. Caila kinda reminds me of Catherine, of the famous Catherine/Sean fandom.

Alright back to group date. Lace steals Ben and goes and apologizes to Ben for being negative and crazy. He admits that he did feel a little as if he were being attacked but also as he analyzed and internalized it, he was attempting to take some of the blame on him, but Crazy Lace is making an appearance. She can’t bit her tongue and let him talk. She interrupts him to tell him that she was crazy and that’s crazy right?!? I don’t know looking at her talking to Ben she doesn’t seem like she’s really all there and into it. She looks drunk in a way, where you’re staring at someone but not all there. She thinks they’re really making a connection and Ben is about to declare his undying love and affection and she’s interrupted by Jubilee.

Ben does seem smitten by Jubilee and you can tell it’s really important to him to put these girls at ease. Jubilee said that something that really stood out to her about Ben was that he did mission work and she was born in another country and adopted. He’s showing that he’s done his homework because he mentions how strong she was from the beginning of her life to her time in the military. He thanks her for opening up and trusting him and then she gets the second kiss! It was a tiny peck but then it turned into something a little more serious, but I don’t know if I see the same spark there that was there in his kiss with Jen.

LB has her time disturbed with Ben, because Lace and her wine glass are coming around the corner to say that she’s not crazy but she needs more time with him. She had like zero time with him and Jubilee stole her time and her kiss! Lace said that she really wants to talk to him, but by that she means she wants to ask him questions and not give him any time or space to actually really answer and have a conversation with him.

Lace comes back to the group and they’re pissed at her. Amber and JoJo have yet to talk to Ben and Lace has talked to him twice.

Ben comes and grabs JoJo and takes her up by the helicopter landing pad. She’s so excited to be spending time with him. He grabs her and the way that he’s looking at her and holding her you can tell there is certainly an attraction there. He thanks her for her positive attitude and bubbliness and that it makes her even more attractive to him. She’s so happy that he took the initiative to bring her to this place. He said he’s trying to get to know her, she’s happy and then we get our 3rd kiss of the night! Ben lays one on her, and I don’t know I was expecting more chemistry from the kiss, but maybe that will come.

Alright, GROUP ROSE time! The girl to receive the first group rose date is JoJo. Becca is the only one who is smiling and laughing besides JoJo. Jubilee was going to cry. Lace is going to claw out JoJo’s eyes.

Caila is going to go on her date. The first one-on-one date of the season! Ben comes into the house greets the ladies and then the ultimate date is going to start with Kevin Hart and Ice-Cube walking into the house. Ben becomes a bit of a fan-girl and evidently did not meet them before the girls, as he tells them that he just saw Kevin Hart in concert 2 weeks ago in Denver and is a nerd around Ice-Cube. Just another moment he endeared himself to me and showed me he’s not immune to celebrities. I think these guys are more celebrities than Jimmy Kimmel, but that’s just my opinion.

They are going to take her on a cheap-sake date to see how she handles it. This is this seasons Costco date. We saw this last season, so it is certainly a little been there, done that.

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Why would Ben and Caila not get in a hot-tub at a hot-tub store and hang out. Kevin joins them in there and all they want is to hang out by themselves. You can see that Ben and Caila have very similar sense of humors and that she’s a great person to take on this date and have a fairly normal date (with the exception of the 2 celebrities.) I just wonder if she’s too young, she just seems so sweet and naive compared to some of the other girls.

Back to the house so we can get the last date card! “Are we a perfect match?”

Emily—twin

Sushanna—hopefully we find out if she speaks English and not just Russian!

Sam—the girl who just passed the bar before she came! Lawyer who teeters on crazy.

Olivia—the front-runner, first impression rose, surprise villain

Haley—other twin

Amanda—mom of 2 kids

 

Back to the night portion of Caila and Ben’s date. They said it’s much more intimate. Ben was happy and relaxed around her. they seem a little bit more nervous around each other, which may be a good sign. Conversation at the beginning isn’t flowing as easily, but they both seem to want to know about each other, and know real normal, honest things. They actually have communication down where one talks and the other is an active listener. It seems once they start talking they become more at ease with one another. She gets the date rose and I’m happy for them. They are pretty gosh dang adorable! And to top it off we get the first concert of someone I’ve never heard of before. But it’s Ben’s favorite song ever, which is obvious. Ben does NOT have a poker face. He starts laughing and then serenading Caila and kissing her, and somehow it’s sweet and not corny. These kids could actually do it, they’ve got me on their team somehow, though I’m still the captain of Team Becca, I like Caila!

Alright, it’s too sweet and normal. So we have to go to our group date! It’s the date of all the blond girls. We’ve got Dr. Love and his team to help decide if Science can help Ben find love.

They first test the girls by putting googles on them and they’re able to put an image on the board and tell where you’re eyes focus and look at the most. The image that cracked me up the most was the fact that they had a picture of Ben and Sean Lowe side by side. Ben showed his humor when he said that he was paying the most attention to that one and that he hoped the girls came back to their Bachelor!

All the girls have to run on a treadmill for step 2 so then Ben can smell them. What makes it even more awkward is that they’re all standing in a line while Ben is blindfolded and sniffing them all individually and giving his thoughts to Dr. Love.

The last part is where we see if there is body heat between them or something or another. Basically it’s a chance for these girls to freak out about Ben liking another girl more than them.

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Olivia is super confident in her relationship and her mean girl spirit. She’s the last one to go so she ends up really messing with the girls. I think she’s in it more to “WIN” than she’s in it to “win Ben.” She doesn’t know why he doesn’t kiss her right away and he says he won’t do that with the other girls watching.

Sam got the lowest score with a 2.42 outta 10. She’s devastated. Olivia keeps showing her ridiculous faces and her mean girl antics by saying that a Dr. said that Sam should never marry Ben as they are not compatible. The highest score was a 7.45 outta 10 and that went to Olivia. She’s thrilled and not having a poker face in-front of the rest of the girls. She’s rubbing it in.

I’m just wondering what would’ve happened had Ben had some of the other girls there that he was more attracted to? What would Olivia’s scores look like compared to Becca, Caila, JoJo or Jen?

I don’t know for sure but I think the rest of them would’ve handled themselves with more class than Olivia did. When Ben grabs her to talk she annoys me even more because she’s attempting to play coy.

Here’s the thing, we’ve seen this show go where the guy follows his attraction and “science” more than his feelings. And how has that worked out?!? I’ll tell you, it HASN’T! Those relationships barely make it thru to when the show is airing. If they make it that long the couple is still broken up within a year. So yeah Olivia, you win this initial attraction test, but did you really win?!?!

Olivia does get her kiss, so I’m sure she got everything she wanted and chalk another one up for science against logic! I do feel a need to point out that he kissed her, but there was no conversation to be had. So this will fizzle hot but also quickly and will be done.

By the way Sushanna does speak English!

Amanda does steal him to talk to him about the fact that he has 2 daughters. He handles it really well, he had been lounging and once she brings up her girls, he sits up and is super engaged. He asks the right questions, he wants to know their ages, names, he wants to see a picture. She said that they are younger, cooler versions of her which makes him laugh. He kisses Amanda. He ends the night by telling her to tell them hi from him.

Ben makes the mistake by giving the group date rose to Olivia. She tells us she’s going to be Olivia Higgins. Amanda is crying and I want to give her a giant hug and this is the first time I’m pissed at Ben and want him to give Amanda the rose and not the mean girl Olivia!

It’s time for our cocktail party! Ben grabs Leah who is the girl who hiked her football through her legs. She looks more normal and I think I like her better tonight then the first night. He tells us that he felt confident in their relationship so that’s why he felt okay with her not going on a group date.

Olivia is really going for the kill here and she decides to steal Ben after he’s done talkin to Leah. When he is coming up to her he proves to us that he is a 13 year old boy in a 26 year olds body. He does the whole “Wazzz-upppp” and goes in for the hug. It’s the I’m gonna act like we’re buddies because I’m terrified of what girl is around the corner paying attention to this interaction.

The girls want to kill her because they don’t have a rose and she does. Olivia and Ben are not talking they are just kissing each other.

Oh man, so Olivia comes back and the girls are being passive aggressive to her. Until our kettle needs to call the pot black. Lace grabs Olivia to talk to her. Under the pretense that she wants to get to know her. Olivia tells Lace that the rose doesn’t mean that she quits and is gonna keep trying. Lace points out to us and Olivia yet again that she gets interrupted all the time, so it’s like her and Ben have only been around each other for 30 seconds.

Lace tells us again that she needs to make sure that Ben doesn’t think she’s crazy. She decides yet again that, that should be her lead in with Ben. Honey, honey, honey…you can see Ben’s mind is just going and he wants her to stop talking and he wants her to not embarrass herself on national television, but doesn’t want her to freak on him. So she tells us about her awkward teenage years and goes into details that I was praying she’d stop telling us! She’s in the middle of her story when Lauren B comes in.

Ben gives her the largest grin and I don’t know if it’s because it’s Lauren, or if it’s because SOMEONE/ANYONE came and saved him!

Insecure Lace came out and now she’s crying in the bathroom and I feel so bad for her!

Ben had a picture developed of him and Lauren B from the first night. He is giving it to her to show that he is thinking of her even though she didn’t go on a date this week. Lauren B. is our flight attendant. They seem like they are actually having a genuine conversation and again I get the impression from the two of them much like the first night, that this is very natural. The way they interact is how you see people interact in real life. Or at least how people who are interested in dating one another and are working on something more serious interact. It’s not just a casual hookup. It’s both of them putting themselves out there just a little bit and both feeling somewhat insecure. He wants her to feel special and that she’s important to him.

Lauren H. our Kindergartner teacher got a first place ribbon from Ben for having the largest explosion at the science fair. She LOVES it! And that simple gesture means a lot to her and you can tell how that reaction means a lot to him.

Ben grabs Amanda and said he needs to explain something to her. He wants to know more about the girls. He wants to be involved and have them feel as if they’re involved in this process. He has hair barrettes with roses that he wants to make for her girls. It brings her to tears and she hugs him and I think that shows more than a group rose date.

Ben doesn’t get to talk to all the girls tonight, so you know that Olivia is even more hated because of that. Amber tells us that she didn’t get to talk to him at all this week so she’s basically in last place. Ben doesn’t remember who she is probably, so she is in last place. If only she would’ve ran faster than Mandi, she’d had had her time.

Alright, well here we go with the rose ceremony!

Those with roses already are:

  1. JoJo
  2. Caila
  3. Olivia

Rose Ceremony roses go to:

  1. Amanda—-mom, way to redeem yourself Ben!!!
  2. Jubilee—she did open up a lot this week, so she earned it and got herself a kiss
  3. Lauren B—good call in not making her wait too long in the ceremony Ben, she waited all week to talk to you!
  4. Leah—same info as Lauren 🙂
  5. Becca—WOOT WOOT!!!!
  6. Rachel—no date this week for our 23 year old unemployed hover-board girl, but she still got herself a rose!
  7. Lace—interesting that she got a rose this early on in the rose ceremony and it didn’t get drug on. She’s on for the producers, there’s obviously no love connection.
  8. LB—she wants to talk to him when he asks to accept the rose. She told him that it’s really hard for her to be here. All the girls are stage whispering about what’s going on. Becca attempts to be the voice of reason and said she may want a moment before she accepts it. She doesn’t accept it. He hugs her and sends her on her way.
  9. Jennifer—Bennifer 3.0 is still alive and kicking
  10. Emily—twin
  11. Jamie—didn’t get a rose this week and just realized she’s still there and is not Amber like I thought she was.
  12. Lauren H—teacher who gets to go!
  13. Sushanna—-guess the few times they spoke in English were worth it
  14. Haley—other twin!

Final Rose!!!

18. Amber—guess it helped to know the producers as i feel that’s what got her that rose.

So we’re actually down to 17 girls!

Going home tonight is:

  1. LB
  2. Sam—well your family and friends will celebrate passing the bar with you!
  3. Mandi—crazy dentist didn’t have to stay along forever, but she did get a tiarra and letterman’s jacket as a parting gift!
  4. Jackie—hmmm guess we don’t need to save the date for the two of them anymore 😦

 

Well we survived high school yet again. It was a little touch and go there, but I’m glad we did it! I will be back next Monday night, I promise! Until then, have an awesome week!

Lindsay

 

 

 

 

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