“The Drama is Over” oh wait it’s the Bachelor!

I have to tell you all that having the Bachelor to look forward to on Monday’s helps make Monday’s just a little bit more bearable. Is that sad to admit, probably, but it’s the truth and there’s no way I’m the only one to feel that way! I’m just secure enough to admit it ๐Ÿ™‚

So I saw this tweet earlier this week and it legit made me laugh out loud. ย It’s SO TRUE! I have to be honest, I’m a little jealous, because my mouth is so small I’ve had to have teeth pulled. She never has to worry about that. You DO NOT want to play Chubby Bunny with Olivia, you’d lose every time!

Alright, we’re onto episode 3 of Ben’s season. I’m crossing my fingers that Ben continues to make the right choices and I continue to like him.

We start the episode off with Lauren B. (cute girl, flight attendant, first outta limo, hasn’t gone on a date yet, but Ben really likes her!) and Amanda (mom of 2 girls) sitting on the patio drinking coffee and having girl talk. They talk about how amazing all the girls are, except one and she’s named Olivia. Olivia evidently spent $40,000 on clothes! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?! Even if I would’ve won the Powerball last week that’d be hard for me to comprehend spending that much money on clothes.

Our voices of reason are telling us that she’s not a nice girl and they can’t relate to her and she’ll show her true colors at some point. She’s just great at showing Ben and the cameras the nice side and not the mean girl.

Harrison shows up and he tells the girls to suck it up, their boyfriend is dating 20 other girls and it’s gonna be awkward. He drops off the date card and it’s for LAUREN B! The Sky is the limit!

Ben tells us that he’s very invested in Lauren B and she’s stood out to him since she first got out the limo. They are driving down the highway and he’s making her try and guess where they’re going. She’s a planner so you can tell is a little apprehensive that she doesn’t know what’s going on. He tells her she won’t be scared of what they’re gonna do, but he may be.

They show up to an airport. There is a little airplane that you see at airshows. The ones that do tricks in the air. Or for us in the Midwest, it looks like a crop duster. She’s freaking out because it has one propeller. Ben endears himself to me even more when he becomes Aladdin and asks her to join him on his magic carpet ride. I swoon, she just freaks out.

Then they’re flying over the water and doing flips in the sky and my stomach is literally in my throat. My hands are sweating. My pulse is racing. Yes, I’m sitting on my couch in my fuzzy socks and blanket, and I know that, yet my imagination is with them on that damn plane. They’re all flirting and kissing and I’m having a panic attack. Let’s just say if I were on the plane with him he would not be sayin “I have a great view on my right and a great view on my left.”

They fly over the Bachelor Mansion so all the girls can see them fly by while they’re lounging on the plane. Luckily the lasers they’re shooting at the plane aren’t able to be viewed or damage the plane, but man Lauren B. tread lightly when you come home!

We finally land the plane and are on a remote looking piece of land. They’re walking around and then out of nowhere Ben has her jump on his back so he can give her a piggy back ride. Of course, there’s randomly a hot-tub in the middle of nowhere. Lauren goes and changes behind a tree and he meets her in the hot-tub.

They make out but they also seem to talk a little bit. He really seems smitten with her already, even though it’s just the first date. Lauren seems very real and genuine though. When you watch them, they actually seem like someone you’d see at a restaurant hanging out.

We go back to the mansion and I hope that Calia has been drinking because she’s already bawling about Ben going on dates with other girls. Honey, honey, honey! This is the THIRD episode, it’s gonna get a heck of a lot worse for you. This is only the 2nd one on one date. You’re gonna be screwed if you can’t handle not getting every one on one date.

We’re back to Lauren and Ben. He must be serious, because the first question we hear him ask her is “What does life look like for you?” “What makes you happy?” Lauren tells us that she likes really simple things and that her dad is someone who takes pride in his lawn. He fishes for compliments on his lawn and she’ll give them. Ben is CRACKING UP! I get it, and I don’t know if this is an everywhere thing, or maybe just a Midwest thing but people do take pride in their lawns and that’s an everyday type of thing.

She grew up in a tight-knit family and learned the value of work but that work isn’t the be all, end all. She wants her kids to have the same values as her.

Ben asks her how a guy hasn’t already picked her up yet. She tells him that she’s really picky and you can see the “oh crap” look across his face.

Lauren talks about her dad and how much she loves him and you can see that it really affects Ben and he likes her responses.

Back to the mansion and we’re greeted with a date card!

  1. Amanda—-mom
  2. Haley —Twin
  3. Jennifer—Bennifer 3.0
  4. Sushanna—she does speak a little English with her Russian accent
  5. Leah—girl who hiked football thru her dress
  6. Amber—producers will get her outta the house, maybe Ben will learn her name
  7. Lauren H—-kindergartner teacher
  8. Olivia–villain
  9. Jami—not Amber like I thought she was
  10. Rachel—unemployed 23 yr old who came up on a hover-board and hasn’t had a date
  11. Lace—crazy, but needs to tell us 10,000 times she’s not crazy
  12. Emily—Twin

Okay, we’re back to our normal date. Ben tells us that Lauren is really special and he wants her to really know him. Can we take a moment to appreciate the fact that our Bachelor is really coming at this as a relationship. She tells him info, he shares info with her. It’s so dang refreshing!

He tells her a secret. His dad has always had heart problems. Right before this started, he had surgery because he had a blockage. He went to triple bypass surgery. Ben jumped a plane to be with his parents. His mom was a mess. He said he forgot the depths of the love that his parents shared, but was reminded of it when he saw his mom freaking out. Lauren shows us that she listens and cares because she asks how his dad is doing. He tells us he’s doing really really well, but is sad he hasn’t talked to them in awhile. Lauren then tells him that she wants to meet his family and it doesn’t come off as too strong or forced. It seems natural, which I get is insane.

BUT HERE’S THE THING! Lauren realized how creepy that could sound on the first date and attempted to reel it back in. She is embarrassed though, honestly with the way he’s vibing her I don’t think she has anything to worry about! ย She gets the rose!!!

Lucy Angel, who I have no clue who they are, is giving us the next season’s concert. Wow, Ben is actin as if he’s still on the Bachelorette. In his interview he tells us that he’s listening to the lyrics of the song “in a girls arms it changes me” and he’s just thinking about how this girl is changing him. There’s some swaying and making out.

 

Alright, we’re done with cute Lauren and Ben! We need the drama! So here comes a group date! We’re at the Coliseum, which I would be freaking out about because that’s awesome. We don’t care about that. We have 2 girls from the World Cup team joining us and we’re gonna show the girls how to play soccer. The girls are showing the competition and wanting to win more than actually caring about Ben.

Jubilee is crying and freaking out because she’s super complicated and the most complicated girl here. She’s not going to be Suzy Sunshine all the time like Lauren and Caila. She’s crying.

Back to the group date. We’re gonna play a scrimmage. Losers gotta go home, winners will get the after-party. We have stars and stripes. Two 15 minute halves. Good God, that’s a LONG time for how horrible these girls are at soccer.

The Twin’s are finally showing the difference between the two of them. We have Emily who is the Star’s goalie. She is certainly the “STAR” of the Star’s team.

Stripes wins! Amber is the one who scored the winning goal, so maybe Ben will know who she is. The Stars team has to go home and there are lots of tears over that. Tears that continue all the way to the Mansion.

The Stripes team has a mini-cocktail party to celebrate. Ben is talking to the girls and Olivia interrupts him to grab him and pull him aside. The girls are PISSED. Olivia is going to do whatever it takes to hang out with him. Olivia decides it’s a good idea to yell at the girls from the balcony where her and Ben are hanging out.

You can tell that Ben is mortified that she alerted them to where they were. He takes her back inside…and Olivia is making the rookie mistake! We all know from watching the show that you NEVER bring up what’s going on outside the house when you have time to hang out with the lead. You really should never bring up another girl or guy causing drama. However, Olivia wants to bring up the other girls so she can play victim. I would’ve told her don’t play victim until he asks you about the other girls! COME ON!

She doesn’t heed my advice and instead tells Ben that the other girls find her intimidating, which is ridiculous. Ben shows he has a good head on his shoulders when he doesn’t agree with her. He then has the wool pulled over his eyes and does seem to fall for it a little bit more than I’d like. However, he doesn’t seem as into her as he does other girls.

The girls decide they are going to pass along the time by nit-picking and finding things about Olivia to make fun of. They’re obviously threatened so that’s typical mean girl behavior. However, I get frustrated because Jami decides it’s a good idea to be a tattle tale and tell Olivia what they said.

Okay, date card time! Jubilee gets the date card and FREAKS OUT! She’s thrilled. That means that Calia, JoJo and Becca are the ones not going on dates this week.

Okay, back to group date. We see the girls are going thru their time quickly. I’m sorry, maybe these girls will be people we need to pay attention to, but I feel with the exception of Olivia, these girls are fillers and he’s not really feeling any of them.

Amber finally gets her one-on-one time with him. He is not feeling her. She says it’s hard to do this again. He asks her a question, but I think his fake “I’m being polite” to you voice comes out. She doesn’t know how ย to interpret that, so she goes in for the kiss. I’m mortified and yelling “He’s just NOT that into you!!!!!”

He proves me wrong though when he gives her the Group Date rose. I’m wondering though if it’s just because his options are pretty limited.

Jubilee is now ready for her one-on-one date. She thinks Ben’s types are princesses an she’s certainly not a princess. I don’t know, she seems pretty princessy to me in her super trendy looking outfit and long nails! She’s worried she’s going to be really socially awkward on this date, and that my friend is why you’re on this show. It is a socially awkward show, you’re fine!

Ben walks in, comes and sits next in the living room on the couch. He asks what time it is and Jubilee decides the best way to start off the date is by pointing out that he’s 20 minutes late. Now yes, if that’s REAL LIFE you ABSOLUTELY call him out on being 20 minutes late. However, Jubilee, you ain’t in real life. You have no flipping clue if it’s Ben’s fault, or maybe a producer, cameraman, heck even one of the girls who are sitting with you on the couch could be the reason they’re late. You gotta pick up on your social cues and know when to say stuff and when to bite your tongue. Also, no need to call him out in-front of a group of girls, that’s a convo that can be had in private.

There’s nervous laughter and then we hear the familiar (for this show, not in my real life) sounds of a helicopter. It’s going to land in the backyard, and maybe that’s the reason why Jubilee he was 20 minutes late.

Jubilee is terrified of heights and asks if anyone wants to go on her date. All the girls are pissed by that and want to go on the date. Jubilee’s game is to play hard to get. Which is the complete opposite of how Lauren B. was towards him. I don’t think Ben appreciates the coy attitude.

They are spending their day at a health spa. They are trying fancy foods like caviar. Ben really likes the taste of it, and she can’t stomach it. I know, I know, how am I givin the girl who’s scared of heights and doesn’t like scary food crap, but here’s the thing….there’s no way in hell I’d take as large of bite of caviar as she did. You gotta nibble on that thing, and have some sort of liquid near you to wash it down. That’s WAY more lady like than spitting it out. Jeez sooooooo many rookie mistakes made tonite!

Evidently her go-to food is hot dogs. Which Ben doesn’t know how to handle. She talks about how insecure she was about getting the date card. He seems shocked by that and he is great about how he reassures her. He gives her confidence without promising the world to her. She gets to be herself and is the unfiltered person. Of course they gotta spend some time in a hot tub. Where she tells him that he doesn’t laugh very often. Which he’s very confused by. She tells him he laughs, but it’s more awkward laughter than genuine laughter. She calls him out on stuff and tells him that he needs to relax and not stress out as much. You can tell he’s taking what she says to heart.

They have a very serious talk at dinner. He asks her why she hasn’t gone back to Haiti. She talks about how she has a love/hate relationship with her past. She had a hard past but it made her who she is today and she loves who she is today. She then tells us that her whole family except for her died. She deals with a lot of guilt over that. Wow!!!! Ben is such a reassuring listener, he lets her get it out, has tears in his eyes and then points out how strong she is and the depth there is to her. He said that it was very intense and he appreciates how she’ll talk about the stuff others aren’t willing to talk about. He sweetly kisses her hand and asks her to accept this rose. She says yes and jumps into his arms.

Random sidenote…..does anyone else notice that sometimes he says “Will you accept THIS rose?” and other times he says “Will you accept MY rose?” My theory is that he says “MY” to the girls that he’s really interested in and putting himself out there more.

Okay, we’re back to the house. All the girls are surprised that Jubilee is there. There’s lots of talking and I wonder if it all has to do with Jubilee, or they’re just showing random footage to make it seem like everyone really hates Jubillee?

Ben comes into the rose ceremony and seems a little off. He tells the girls he got a phone call from his family today and 2 people who are close to his family passed away in a plane crash the night before. He’s really upset and is more down and wants to be able to have someone to sit down and talk to them.

Believe it or not, the first person to grab him after this announcement is Olivia! And you’ll never believe it, but she doesn’t deviate from the script she has in her mind about what she was planning on talking about tonight. She doesn’t make ANY mention of how sorry she is for his loss, or acknowledge his pain, instead she talks about how we all have something about our bodies we would like to change. She wants to change her legs and cankles, she starts crying about it and you can tell he’s exasperated and doesn’t wanna talk about her cankles.

We go to him and Amanda and she acknowledges his tough day and if he wants to talk she’s there to talk. You can see him physically relax.

Jubilee has set up an area where she can give him a massage. She wants to help him relax and he appreciates it. JoJo and Becca are frustrated since they haven’t had their time this week. Word spreads like wildfire and all the girls find out about the massage and are pissed.

Jami decides she wants to be the one to interrupt and Ben is very embarrassed to be caught. Somehow the girls think that she should’ve just stayed away and it was disrespectful and rude. I don’t know why Amber decided she needed to be the one to address the tension and go after Jubilee.

Jubilee is in the bathroom because she doesn’t want to deal with the girl drama. She goes after JoJo and tells her to leave her alone. Ben hears this confrontation and goes upstairs to talk to her. They’re talking. Amber decides that enough is not enough and wants to talk to Jubilee. So she goes into the bathroom and Jubilee starts crying right when Amber walks in. Ben is super confused right now, and let’s be honest, this is the LAST thing he needs right now!

Ben basically tells Amber to back off. He likes Jubilee for her and he wants her to be herself and not walk on eggshells. ย He assures her he had a great date and if she questions anything she needs to come find him….and with that Amber I think you sealed your fate that you’ll be going home next week.

Ben finally gets a chance to sit down and relax. Well as relaxed as he can be on a couch with all the women surrounding him. He’s sitting there and Lace asks if she can talk to him. You can tell that’s the last thing he wants to do. But he agrees and they go outside.

Lace is in tears but is also the most coherent we’ve heard her. She admits that she has a lot of work she has to do on herself and she wants to offer him more. She says she can’t love someone else until she loves herself. In true Lace fashion, she interrupts him one more time. She proves how mature she is by leaving and telling him that he’s gonna find a great girl inside. I’m actually impressed, she was not crazy Lace tonight at all! Maybe it mostly was the alcohol!

We’re at rose ceremony time and I’m very thankful for that fact, for poor Ben who’s earned it and deserves a good night’s rest after this fiasco of a night!

Alright so where we stand with roses:

  1. Lauren B —-got it on one-on-one date
  2. Amber —– group date rose
  3. Jubilee —– second one-on-one date
  4. Lauren H. —- I loved her pink dress ๐Ÿ™‚
  5. Amanda —- the mom for the win!
  6. Becca —– My girl got NO real screen time and NONE with Ben, but they are very smiley at each other at the rose ceremony, so I’ll consider that a win!
  7. Haley — Twin
  8. Emily — Twin
  9. Rachel —- unemployed 23 old
  10. Caila — we’ll get to see her cry over other girls getting a date yet again
  11. JoJo —- guess no date this week didn’t hurt her chances!
  12. Jennifer — Bennifer 3.0 still has a chance!
  13. Leah — maybe she’ll hike another football

Final Rose goes to:

14. Olivia —– Big shock…..not really. She’s going with the philosophy that he’s saving the best for last.

 

Those without roses and going home are:

  1. Lace
  2. Sushanna —- we didn’t know you at all.
  3. Jami —- she’s shocked she didn’t get a rose. Since I still have no clue who she is, I don’t know why that’s shocking. Her lesson is to not expect anything from humans so she’s done with humans!

Olivia tells us that her and Ben are soooooo on the same wavelength. He tells her stuff without telling her things. His arm on her leg when he’s getting off the couch isn’t an accident, it’s a promise of a rose. Him choosing her last and hugging her (LIKE EVERY SINGLE OTHER GIRL) is him telling her that he can’t give her everything right away. I feel like Olivia is collecting his hair and other things so she can make he own Ben Higgins….she’s at the creepy obsessed really early stage.

Next week we’re heading to Vegas! And what happens in Vegas doesn’t stay in Vegas on the Bachelor! We got JoJo and Becca with one-on-one dates it looks like and we get an Olivia meltdown. It’s going to be a prime episode! BRING IT ON!

Until next week, attempt to stay warm!

Lindsay

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