Welcome back friends!
We start off with Andi & Nick at Nick’s hotel room, where Nick is pouring them whiskey to have this conversation. Nick wants to know why the hell Andi is here and Nick, the answer for that is that Andi still wants to milk her 15 mins for all that it’s worth and hasn’t been on our TV screens for quite awhile and since she was the Bachelorette, I think that means you sell your soul and ABC/Disney/ESPN own you forever and can make you do whatever they want whenever they want.
We go back and forth of Harrison escorting the final 4 girls to the rose ceremony and an awkward conversation between exes.
They talk about how Nick can relate to Andi more, he’s not gonna propose just to the last girl, let’s joke about how we broke up on national tv, but oh wait, now I’m breaking up with girls on tv. Andi asks a conversation that all girls ask their ex boyfriends, “are you planning on sleeping with all 3 girls in the fantasy suite?” She’s acting like she doesn’t know Nick at all, we know the answer. But then Nick plays it all, I don’t know and then for some reason Andi gives him the green light and tells him to sleep with them all. Probably because she doesn’t want to look bad for doing it. We’re pretending that this conversation is giving these 2 exes closure and that they’re friends, I’m not buyin it at all. They both just were waiting until the producers gave them the okay to be able to end the conversation.
Okay, we’re at the rose ceremony. For some reason we have another freezing cold rose ceremony outside in New York City in the Fall. This makes ZERO sense! The wind also makes it appear that we’re in the middle of a hurricane or tornado!
Roses go to:
- Raven—our country girl gets to go to the fantasy suite
So Corrine is going home and she immediately starts crying, but also appears as if she’s grinning as she’s crying. She reminds me of my 2.5 month old nephew, who will go from smiling to frowning, or if he’s yawning and his mouth is open he thinks he must be crying and will cry. I actually believe Luke and his tears more than I buy Corrine’s right now.
Nick does a good job of consoling her and this is the first time that I think that Nick is showing that he knows that there’s a huge age/maturity gap between the 2 of them. He’s going to miss the hell outta her, isn’t that what every girl wants to hear? She wishes him luck, hugs him and gets in the reject limo.
In the reject limo she is bawling, but there are NO TEARS coming out of her eyes. These are the fake tears she used on Daddy to get her way. She wants love in a “normal way” and a “normal relationship.” She’s done showing her men how much she loves and worships them she wants guys to do that to her now. Don’t worry her champagne glass is back and empty. This is her audition for Bachelor in Paradise and is just setting it up for her to be the star of the Women Tell All next week.
Also, this just proves that the producers wanted her to stay around until hometowns so we could see how she lived and meet Raquel. There is no connection between her and Nick and there never was, he was somewhat physically attracted to her, but the producers wanted her to stick around, probably because Daddy paid them to, and she went with it.
If you haven’t watched this segment from Jimmy Fallon where he talks about the Bachelor, do yourself a favor and watch it!
My issue is that we know Rachel has to be going home at the end of the fantasy suite dates, because there’s no way in hell they’d do a finale where she’s one of the final 2, or that takes all of the suspense outta the finale.
We’re going from NYC to Finland. So the Bachelor will not be sweating his butt off as he proposes, instead he’ll be freezing his ass off. So a nice change of pace I guess! Something new & different for us 🙂
We’re looking for LOTS of filler, we see Nick checking in at the airport, we see the cartoon map twice, we see him outside the hotel, we see him walk into the hotel, we see him on the balcony, we see lots of wildlife and then we see him walking across the icy terrain to meet Raven for the first one-on-one date in Finland.
They get in a red helicopter to take off. We hear a voiceover of Raven saying she’s never told anyone she loves them before, which I think is false. I bet she told her ex she loved him before and they just spliced that together to make it appear as if she’s never said she loves him before.
After the helicopter ride they are playing darts in a Finnish pub. Raven feels like this date could be an everyday date…I mean who doesn’t get in the helicopter every day to sight-see and then go and play darts with locals in a pub?
We then have them having a convo and recapping hometowns. We talk about Daddy getting the news about being cancer-free. Raven admits to being a Daddy’s girl and her deal-breaker is if a guy isn’t close to his mom. Nick talks about how he’s always looking for someone opposite of his mom. He needs a girl with edge who will challenge him. He’ll cook because Raven doesn’t cook and she’ll fold laundry because he hates doing that. They figured it out, no Raquel needed! This is a conversation that actually endears Nick to me, because this is him being the least douche version of himself.
Raven’s fears of the night are saying I love you and having sex at the end of the night. What about the fact that he’s going to do the same exact thing with 2 other girls?!? That’d scare me. Evidently we are not going to beat around the bush or try to use euphemism. Raven is just blunt and talks about stuff that shouldn’t be mentioned on national tv. I don’t need to know about what happened behind close doors with her and her ex.
Night portion of the date means we have to see the worst fashion choice Nick has had of the season, which is saying something with all the tiny and tight pants he’s had this season. Nick is wearing a turtle neck. He looks like he refuses to show any skin whatsoever…what makes it even more ridiculous is the fact that Raven is wearing a shirt that has no shoulders. Nick just looks like a wuss now.
We recap the date, we tend to recap a lot with the 2 of them. We talk about playing darts and I actually tune out for a little while.
I’m back when she talks about how she actually didn’t say she loved her ex because she was afraid to say it and didn’t think it was safe. She wasn’t safe because he would hurt her feelings and she knew it. They dated 2 years and she never said I love you and he only did when he was drunk.
Raven needs to finish her wine, and tells him that on their one-on-one and she saw him with his family, she had a comforting feeling and she’s never felt that with another guy. She gets emotional, he gets emotional, and then we bring up Daddy who prayed for Raven to have “an easy love” and after she had time with Nick it was an easy love. She does love him and it would be the worst thing she could do to not tell him. He does seem smitten and he does brighten up when she gives her speech. Maybe he loves her?????
He gives her the fantasy suite card and she talks about how she’s only been with one guy before. She doesn’t pause at all, she accepts. She reminds him that she’s only been with one other person and then gives TMI, enough where Nick blushes so you can imagine what I feel:
And we’re going to leave on that awkward note. We have 3 hours next week. The next hour of the 2 fantasy suite night and tears as Nick hands out the rose. Then we have the 2 hour Women Tell All, otherwise known as the Corrine show, I’m sure.
Until next week!