Rachel’s 3rd episode

Let’s start off by talking about the revelation that came out this week about the reason why Rachel likes basketball so much could be because of her ex-boyfriend being Kevin Durant, formely of the Oklahoma City Thunder, now the Golden State Warriors. The Kevin Durant who gave this moving MVP speech and talked about how his mom is the real MVP and cried and didn’t care who knew it when he showed how much he loves him Mom:

Yeah….so good luck Bachelor contestants trying to live up to Kevin Durant. Rachel, it looks like Kev is still single, so if/when you and your final guy break-up, you should probably look him up. ABC is airing the NBA Finals (which he’s playing in) so they’d have a hook-up for you!

Alright, back to this episode. We’re back with DeMario trying to sneak back in, and Rachel isn’t having any of it. She shows again why she may very well be my favorite Bachelorette. She doesn’t fall for his smooth talking, or his puppy dog eyes or good looks. She tells him, had he been honest with her, there’s a chance he could be in the mansion, but contrary to his cute lil quote he spouted out his happiness is not in the mansion, but she’s hoping he finds happiness, but finds it elsewhere, goodbye DeMario and walks away and towards the guys who’d gone out to save her, to realize she ain’t no damsel in distress and doesn’t need no saving!

We finally get to the rose ceremony where we have:

  1. Peter—first one-on-one date and rose
  2. Dean—Mr. Smiley got the group rose date
  3. Josiah—second date rose for feeling protective of her
  4. Bryan—chiropractor, 37, first impression guy
  5. Bryce—firefighter
  6. Eric—-the guy from ATFR who danced with her
  7. Anthony—no clue other than he looks like Mr. Clean
  8. Will—he dressed up like Urkel the first night, but got the kiss tonight playing basketball on the driveway, you go Urkel!
  9. Jonathan—-tickle monster is going further than I thought he would
  10. Jack Stone—attorney with very white, great smile
  11. Matt—-he dressed up like a penguin the first night & I got nothing else
  12. Alex—-no clue, but he’s Russian
  13. Adam—-he’s the one who brought AJ the lil doll/puppet with him
  14. Kenny—professional wrestler/who has the 10 yr old daughter
  15. Brady—-no clue
  16. Lee—singer/songwriter who will become a villain
  17. Iggy—-he’s the one who just keeps squeaking by
  18. Fred—-from camp counselor to Bachelorette
  19. FINAL ROSE—-Diggy—he has 500 pairs of shoes you know

 

So those going home are Jamie, I have no clue who Jamie is. Blake & Lucas aka WABOOM. Lucas & Blake are ridiculous and going home because they cared more about one-upping each other than they did about Rachel. They then argue on the driveway in their final interview and it seems so forced and fake. Did they plant this? Are they actually friends and knew they’d get America talking if they “hated” each other?Also, this is their audition for Bachelor In Paradise, which is crap and I don’t want to see either of them on Paradise, let alone both of them together. At least Nick & Josh on Bachelor in Paradise their feud started on the Bachelorette, rather than this oneย anigif_enhanced-buzz-2942-1366673535-7

Alright, we’re going on our group date! We’re going to the Ellen show and taking:

  1. Bryan
  2. Jonathan
  3. Peter
  4. Alex
  5. Will
  6. Fred

They are going on the set of Ellen and who doesn’t love the Ellen Dejeneres show. They all know they’re gonna have to dance so they’re attempting to warm up and get used to that. Ellen cracks me up as Rachel gives her a heads about the guys intro out of the limo, she’s not a fan of tickle-monster and also not a fan of Urkel. Though Ellen does tickle the tickle monster.

The guys come out and ย are dancing like strippers with the audience and Rachel & Ellen are laughing and critiquing them. The one that was the most surprising was Alex, our Russian has a hidden side.

I have to admit this date, Bryan’s cockiness annoyed me just a tad. Not enough to root against him, but enough for me to want him to be a little bit quieter because I didn’t want him to say something that would make me like him less. The good news is that I liked Peter more, as he was the one during Never Have I Ever that said he hadn’t thought about having sex with Rachel yet. Of course ABC got the questions risque by asking about nude selfies, who’s peed in the mansion pool (ahem Alex) and who’s kissed Rachel before.

The worst thing about this date is that Fred was all up in his head once he found out that most of the guys had kissed Rachel except for him on this date. So he asked if he could kiss her, and Rachel acted as if it was the most bizarre request ever, but I thought he handled it very tastefully and if anything, she was the one who made it slightly weird. She says the moment is gone and it’s awkward, he starts talking again but interrupts himself when his face lands on her face and he makes out with her. She kisses him back and he’s so excited. He tells us in his interview that he loves her and when they kissed he saw their wedding day. This boy was obsessed with a girl he knew 20 years ago, and built it up to be too much in his head.

Well Rachel grabs the rose and Fred, and ends up saying she respects him too much but doesn’t see a future, she only sees their past and I’m so sad for Fred and embarrassed for him and want him to stop talking about how he loves her! I respect that she didn’t lead him on, but it was painful.

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Alex gets the group date rose on this date.

The one-on-one date was for her and Anthony, Mr. Clean. They ride horses down Rodeo drive and i don’t really understand this date. I think this is the attempt of being the equivalent of the makeover date they do on the Bachelor, though it wasn’t quite that, they got cowboy boots and hats that they tried on while staying on their horses they took into the stores. ย Anthony grew on me because he had a very strong confidence about himself this whole date and was an active listener and Rachel seemed to be falling for it. It wasn’t a super memorable date for me, but as long as it was for Rachel & Anthony that’s all that really matters ๐Ÿ™‚

The last group date had us bring back some of Rachel’s girls. We have Corrine, Raven, Jasmine and Alexis. The girls set-up a date where we’re taking the guys to a Saloon so they can mud-wrestle. The girls on the way to the saloon ask guys who they think may not be here for the right reasons. Bryce the firefighter is super sweet and trying to be as PC as possible and ultimately says he doesn’t think Eric & Rachel are a great fit. Well Raven goes and tells Rachel that Bryce as well as Lee both told her they don’t trust Eric’s motives.

After Bryce wins the round-robin mud wrestling tournament, Rachel grabs Eric to talk to him. Now since the last rose ceremony Eric has gotten all up in his head about the mind games and what is really going on this show. I think the producers are messing with him, or he’s not realizing that the contradictory things he sees are producer driven. Someone pointed out that Eric is very naive. He’s never been in a real relationship before and wears his heart on his sleeve and some of the guys take advantage of it and push his buttons to their advantage. This whole situation with Eric upset me, especially concerning Lee who seemed to just to want to stir the pot, but be far enough away you don’t realize all the angst he’s causing. I feel like Eric was the victim of Lee’s manipulation way more than Eric actually purposely starting something. He got the rose on the date, but we were left with another “To be continued” because Eric is trying to defend himself against Lee who is stirring the pot and I’m afraid Eric is going to go home & we’re gonna be stuck with Lee.

Overall this episode was good, there wasn’t a whole lot of substance to this episode. I’m glad Waboom & Blake are both gone, as I was not fans of them. Poor Fred and poor Eric. There was lots of dialogue going on with the guys and this showed yet again, they can be more dramatic than the girls when they’re all at the mansion. That seems like a good thought to leave you with ๐Ÿ™‚

Until next week!
Lindsay

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Rachel goes on her First Dates

Welcome back friends!

Happy Memorial Day weekend! We have Rachel waking up and taking her dog in his cast on his front leg for a walk. She’s here to find a husband even after night one.

Harrison comes in and warns the guys to be here for the right reasons and tells us we’re going to have 2 group dates and 1 one-on-one date. Here’s the first date card of the season! “I’m looking for husband material”

  1. Dean—smiley guy (once you go black you never go back)
  2. Jack—Jack Stock lawyer
  3. Jon—tickle monster
  4. Blake—aspiring drummer who talked about all the sex he gets and how “BIG” he is
  5. Iggy—the running commentator of the season
  6. Kenny—-pro-wrestler who has the adorable daughter
  7. Fred—she was his camp counselor
  8. Lucas—-WaBooom

They come up to Rachel in a field, while she’s BBQ in a short cocktail dress I’d never wear to a BBQ but would wear to a wedding. They’re getting food & drink and I notice a keg at the end of the table which i find interesting for the 9 of them, but maybe the keg is left over from the 1st night and they gotta use it.

They play some touch football and are having fun.

Then Rachel ends the game and says there’s a second part of the date and they need to walk to the other side of this park. They’re walking over and standing waiting for them is Ashton Kutcher & Mila Kunis, Ashton is wearing “Trophy Husband” t-shirt. Whom I love both of them and in-case you didn’t know, they are legit Bachelor fans, as evidence by this tweet last year:

Ashton & Mila love Rachel and want to help her find a husband. They make the guys raise their hands if they have health insurance and a job. Some of the guys joke about how they have low standards and Mila jokes asking if they’ve watched the Bachelor before?!? Ashton & Mila are thrilled that they’re on a Saturday date with one another & Rachel while grandma & grandpa are watching their kids. Ashton makes a bold prediction that Rachel’s guy is not in this group & you know what, with the exception of Kenny, I agree with Ashton, he’s the only one I could see possibly making it to hometowns. Mila tells him he needs to slow down and it’s day 2 he can’t make that assumption already, and he said he knew day 1 that Mila was his girl and she cracks me up because she says “somebody is definitely getting laid tonight” and this is why they’re perfect for each other because neither starts laughing.

We have the guys go through a ridiculous obstacle course to see if they’re husband material. It comes down to Lucas & Kenny & Lucas wins by shoving Kenny. Lucas is telling Rachel he really wants Ashton to give them a Waboom & here’s another reason I love Ashton. “A what? I don’t even know what that was…I’m conf…for what? Why?” Mila is trying to help Ashton get it, but he doesn’t get it. Lucas yells Waboom & the guys are all just watching it and not loving it.

We’re at the night portion of the date. Rachel is wearing a zip-up dress, that is zipped down to there and up to there, but she’s able to pull it off. Blake tells the guys that he knows Lucas from a previous experience and Lucas has done this Wabooom act for 3 years (dear Lord, really this isn’t just an ABC thing?) Lucas writes her a poem and she enjoys it.

Rachel is talking to Fred and saying that she can’t get past the kid he was at summer camp. Rachel is not feeling these guys, you can tell she’s bored outta her mind and is not attracted to these guys. Any body language expert will tell you that she’s closed off. Her arms are folded, legs are crossed, she’s not inviting any of these guys into her personal space whatsoever.

Peter gets the coveted first one-on-one date of the season. We know Peter because he’s from Wisconsin and is trying to convince her all guys from Wisconsin are not douche bags like Nick! I’m not gonna lie, I like me some Peter, we’ll see if I continue to feel that way after the date, but so far, I’m a fan. He could be Ben Higgins cousin when it comes to looks ๐Ÿ™‚

So back to this boring ย group date. Blake is committing the cardinal sin of ย the Bachelor. He is using his one-on-one time with the lead to badmouth another contestant. Not only is he using his time to do that, he’s using his FIRST one-on-one time with her since night 1 to do so. Even if this works out right now, let’s be honest, this isn’t gonna work out in the long run!

Blake tells Rachel that the competition pissed him off and he hates Waboom. She’s confused tryin to figure out how you can get this angry about a person you just met, to find out that Blake is currently living with Wabooom’s ex-girlfriend. They’re roommates, because yeah that’s just a weird coincidence. Waboom is a tool who is a clown and turns it on for tv & has makeup that he bought at a dept store to look good on tv.

Blake then comes back to the guys and tells Lucas that he (just happened to) come up in their one-on-one time and Blake told Rachel that Lucas is there to further his career and Blake is so happy to have this weight off his chest. I’m so over both of them.

Dean, smiley guy is able to get Rachel to warm up. They are laughing and joking about what did Ashton & Mila say and the advice they gave. Rachel did bring up the first night that they met on the After the Final Rose and that she loved his “I’m ready to go black and not go back” line, she said the only thing was is that she was hoping to use that line on the show on a guy, but it was stolen from her, but she loved it and his confidence. You can tell there is legit chemistry between these two. In his interview he talked about how they kept it pretty surface level for right now, but he made her laugh, she made him laugh, but he’s wondering if he blew it by not going in for the kiss and that just endeared him to me some more!

Kenny gets his moment with Rachel and he’s talking about his daughter and how he loves her and wants to bring someone in the circle of him and his daughter. She’s not as open as she was with Dean, but she’s not as closed off as the other guys.

The rose is going to Dean and he’s thrilled. He walks her out which is a nice move that I don’t believe we’ve seen and if we have it’s been a long time, guys take note, this gives you a lil extra time alone with the lead. He walks her out, gives her a hug, jokes about how she could see him at the next group date or one-on-one and she teases him about being greedy, and then he goes in for the kiss by the car, and he doesn’t eat her face off when he kisses her and I’m officially a Dean fan ladies & gentlemen.

Peter & Rachel are joined by Copper, Rachel’s dog and it seems he passed the test of the dog loving him. They flew to Palm Springs and they are at Bark-fest. There’s a pool for the dogs, smoothies, etc. Peter & Rachel are lounging in an inflatable pool watching Copper run around. They are having a real honest conversation and this date looks like a semi-typical first date. They’re talking about would she move away from Dallas, he’s willing to move from Madison. They have a dance party & Peter picks up Copper since he still has his cast on and dances with him in his arms & it’s pretty adorable.

We’re at the night portion of the date. Rachel’s first question is asking him how his parents feel. He said his dad never watched the show before, but started watching it and loved Rachel and became his biggest fan in this whole thing. Then they make a joke about their teeth since they each have a gap between their two front teeth. They talk about how it adds character and Rachel says something that to me makes it seem as if ABC was willing to get rid of her gap, but she shows how strong she is and confident in who she is because she is okay having this gap as it gives her character. Rachel talks about how what Peter brings to her experience so far is romance.

These two are having a deeper conversation in their first date than Nick ever had with any of his girls, and I’m sure a deeper conversation than him and Vanessa have still had.

Rachel talks about how she hates this question and gets it a lot, but is gonna ask him “You’re so great, how are you still single?” He talks about how he’s been broken-hearted before and after his last relationship it left him confused so he went to a relationship therapist and it helped him a lot and is helping him now be calm in his thoughts. Her response, is “you’re scaring me” which is generally not a response you want when you’ve just told someone you’ve went to the doctor to work on yourself, so he gives her this look:

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She saves herself and the situation by saying after her long term relationship didn’t work out she knew things weren’t working and she needed to fix herself, so she went to a therapist and it was the best decision she made that year and it got her to the point where she is now and it scares her to hear him articulate what she was thinking/feeling. He confirms it’s a good scary and she verifies, yes, good scary. With that she gives him the rose because she feels drawn to him, he completely exceeds her expectations and she’s extremely hopeful and that’s a huge deal because she’s a very skeptical person. She goes in for the hug, and she won’t let him go and is looking up at him, he gets the hint and finally kisses her. She never gets butterflies, but she gets butterflies with Peter and is going with her gut with Peter and it didn’t disappoint her. She admits to being a smitten kitten with Peter, and dang, I’m a fan of Peter too, which is great because Rachel deserves great guys.

Second group date card: “Swish”

  1. Will
  2. Jamie
  3. Diggy
  4. Alex
  5. Adam
  6. Lee
  7. Matt
  8. Eric
  9. Josiah
  10. DeMario

We’re going to be playing basketball. Kareem Abdul–Jabbar comes into the gym to help the guys out. Rachel talks about how her eyes are on DeMario, he dunked on Rachel and he’s cocky, but there’s a part of Rachel that likes that. We have an audience in this gym that are going to watch the guys play a game.

We see Rachel meeting all of these poor saps who had to sit through one of the worst pick-up games of all time. After the game is over they get to take pictures with her, tell her they’re happy it’s her. Then we get a girl who wants to sit down with her and have a chat on the bleachers.

She says she saw last week on the After the Final Rose that Rachel met a few of the guys and boy was she shocked when one of the guys Rachel met was her boyfriend of 7 months. Rachel asks who, but you know at this point it’s one of 4 guys and chances are it’s not Dean or Blake or she’d had been on the other group date, so it’s either Eric or Demario.

Believe it or not, it’s Demario. Which the Producers had been setting that up all episode. Plus we’d heard from some of the girls from Nicks’ season who were wishing Rachel well that DeMario wasn’t here for the right reasons.

Rachel is tryin to figure out how they broke up. The girl said they actually never broke up. He still has the keys to her apt and it went from them hanging out, to him all of a sudden not stopping by or calling and she hadn’t gotten in touch with him in 3 days and she turned on her tv and all of a sudden there he is:

Rachel is shocked and doesn’t know what to say. Rachel goes back and grabs Demario. He probably thinks he’s getting a rose. He’s talking to her as they walk outta the locker room and is doing his moves. Ex girl stands up, and gets his attention by saying “Karma’s a bitch isn’t it Demario” he goes with “OHHHHHHHH” and then realizes that’s not the right move and tries a new approach of “Who’s this?”

Demario said that they were on-again off-again for awhile, and then he went over to her house and cut it off face to face. Rachel asked him to tell her a date of when they broke up. He’s trying to weave and doesn’t want to give her a straight answer. Poor Rachel is also dealing with crazy ex now lashing out at Demario and letting her crazy flag fly. Rachel can’t get a straight answer outta no one. Demario doesn’t know which story to go with and he’s told so many lies he can’t keep them all straight. Rachel grabs the girls phone and says that what she sees in the phone doesn’t make it appear that he was trying to stop any relationship from happening. Rachel tells him that she knows he wants to be here, but doesn’t want to be here for her and he needs to get the “F*** out” and that makes me like her even more. She kept it together and was articulate even when she was pissed. I think Rachel is pissed at Demario, but is also pissed at ABC and her producers because she was played by them. They knew Demario had a past and they weren’t looking out for Rachel.

Josiah was genuine and real and said he’s looking to protect Rachel and she loved it. He went in for the kiss, and tried to suck off her face, so I wasn’t a huge fan of the kiss, but still like him.

Eric and her went with talking about their love languages and she talked about how quality time and physical touch are her love languages which is not that surprising and why she went in for the hug and kiss with him.

Josiah gets the date rose from Rachel for the deep conversation and the protectiveness she felt around him.

Bryan who got the first impression rose, did not get a date this week but was able to reassure her and get her to smile, was able to make out with her by trying to suck off her face, and then had a table set-up because he’s a Chiropractor, I don’t know if he adjusted her, as it looked more like a massage to me, but she seemed to enjoy it.

We are seeing Rachel laughing and having a good time with the guys, and DeMario shows up at the gates of the mansion, Mr. Harrison is brought forward to talk to him from security. Harrison comes and talks to Demario and says he’ll talk to Rachel and see if Rachel will want to talk to him. Security is hanging with him, but Rachel admits her curiosity is at an all-time high and she’s wondering what he could say. Rachel and Harrison go out to talk to him and the rest of the guys are all coming out of the limo as well to talk to him. And we get the dreaded “TO BE CONTINUED”

We’ll have to turn in next week to see what happens with the mob and Demario, and to get our rose ceremony where hopefully Waboom guy is going home as well as Blake. This week has given me a couple favorites, let’s see what I think next week!

Until then, have a great week and enjoy the first unofficial week of summer!
Lindsay

Rachel Meets her Men

Welcome back friends!!!!

I have to say, that I am even more optimistic than normal for our friend Rachel and this season of the Bachelorette. Yes, I know I can hear you all telling me “Lindsay, you feel this way every season before the first episode.” And you’re right, I do. But with all the disappointment, we have to finally get it right and have a good season!

Before I jump into Rachel’s season, let’s take a second to talk about some Bachelor business over the off-season. First of all, my favorite Bachelor of all time, Ben Higgins and his girl Lauren broke up. Now as someone who follows (ahem, stalks ;)) him on Social Media, this did not come as a surprise. You could tell they weren’t even feeling it this fall when they had their show on Free Form. Then they were slated to promote a couple shows, including the Disney wedding special that I did not watch, but heard it was painfully obvious they weren’t together anymore and what 2 days later we get the official word they’ve broken up. I’m just sayin, any of my Colorado friends, you see him walking around, feel free to slip him my phone number, I think it could be a match made in heaven.

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The sad news from this off-season is about Farmer Chris. He was involved in an accident with a tractor where the driver of the tractor was killed and Chris is being charged with leaving the scene of the crime. Horrible situation, and even though I tease Chris, I wish nothing but the best for him, his family and especially the victim’s family. They are all in my prayers.

Okay, let’s get back to the carefree attitude of the Bachelorette. We are breaking ground people, we have our first African American lead of either the Bachelor or Bachelorette franchise, and how sad is that to say in 2017. I’m just glad it’s finally happening!

Rachel is our Bachelorette, and for those of you who don’t remember her, she was the girl who was WAY TOO GOOD for Nick! She’s a lawyer, who’s funny but doesn’t put up with crap. I think/hope she’ll be a more genuine, real Andi.

As always, I’ve stayed away from any spoilers, so please do not share them with me! With how crazy life and work has been lately, I actually haven’t even gotten on Abc.com like I normally do to scope out the guys ahead of time. I think I’m just going to take it as it comes and see what is on my tv and let the show give me all of my impressions of the guys.

Alright, let’s officially begin the most dramatic journey yet!

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We get to see Rachel meeting her fans. My favorite are the cute lil old ladies who are telling her to listen to the guys, and then not to sleep with all of them ๐Ÿ™‚ She also is bringing her dog who has a broken front leg and is so freakin adorable. I’m endeared to her even more because of her dog and how sweet she is with the lil old ladies!

Alright, let’s meet a few of Rachel’s guys:

  • Kenny—he’s a professional wrestler. His job is ridiculous, but dang if he doesn’t help me get over his ridiculous profession and start liking him right away. He introduces us to his 10 year old daughter McKenzie and there is REAL love there. We’ve seen guys use their kids to manipulate girls (AHEM JUAN PABLO!) but you can tell they actually get along and love one another and he’s a present father.
  • Jack-lawyer from Dallas, TX. Only child who was very close to his mom and she died from cancer and he misses her every day and is looking for a new woman.
  • Alex-Detroit, MI. He seems douche to me, probably because he’s lifting a huge dumbell over his head with a zip-up hoodie that is not zipped up. He’s stereotyped as a nerd, but he loves to code and rubix cubes. His parents are great, especially his mom who says that the girls fall too fast in love on the show.
  • Mohit—San Francisco, he started his own company and is a Bollywood dancer. He’s very close to his family and they’re all starting their own famlies and he wants to do that as well.
  • Lucas—well he’s a disappointment. I’ve become a little more attached to the name Lucas in the last few months since that is my nephew’s name. Well this will be one Lucas I will make sure he doesn’t meet or model himself off of. He’s the insane guy who just wants air-time. Awesome. He yells into our tv multiple times and has made up a word that is better than “BOOM” it’s WaBoom. He has a t-shirt with his face and the catch-phrase.

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  • Blake E- Personal trainer and sports nutritionist. He works out all the time, so lots of testosterone is in his system. And then he starts talking about sex way too much and how awesome he is at it and yeah, I’m sorry but that doesn’t make me like you anymore, it makes me suspicious of you.
  • Diggy- Passionate about fashion and looking good- someone likes his digs and it stuck. Sneaker hoarder. Him & Rachel will have very good looking kids
  • Josiah- Attorney. Hard-working, driven and family is very important to him. I love his demeanor, he has a quiet confidence about him and I’m already at ease. He talks about how close he was with his older brother Sam, and then he talks about how Sam was bullied when they were younger for being overweight and Sam hung himself in their backyard. I know want to climb into the TV and hug Josiah. Ohhhh he cut his brother down from the tree when he was 7 years old. He got in trouble because he looked at the streets for an older brother figure. He got into trouble for burglary at 12, the judge pulled him aside and said he was better than that, and he decided then and there that he wasn’t a gangster or thug, he wanted to help people and is now working at the same state office that gave him a second chance and Josiah is my favorite.

Rachel is back at the Bachelorette with some of her old friends from Nick’s season. We have Corrine, Raven, Alexis (shark-girl), and then a handful of other girls that I can’t remember. Raven tells Rachel that the reason that Rachel was able to get along with all the girls that were there and are all so different is because she was able to see the good and bring out the best in each of them.

Rachel shows up to the mansion, with the soaking wet driveway like always. Harrison is there for the hug and to assure her to be open and not a control freak or a skeptic. Rachel’s dress is gorgeous, she is modest, but still breathtakingly beautiful. Alright, the guys are getting outta the limo, time for first-impression time!

  1. Peter 30- Business owner from Madison, WI, first-one outta the limo is always a good sign. I don’t think I love the patterned jacket with the bow-tie, but then he smiles and it grows on me a little bit. You can tell when they first see each other, there’s a spark and they both are a lil more at ease. His hands are shaking. He points out that he’s from WI and knows she doesn’t have the best luck with WI guys (ahem Nick!)
  2. Josiah- Rachel will have no reasonable doubt by the end that they are meant to be. Joking around with common legal terms and she loves it.
  3. Bryan-37, Miami- ย he is Columbian and talks to her in Spanish and asks if she’s dated a Columbian before and she said no and he said she’s in for trouble and she likes it.
  4. Kenny-35-Professional Wrestler, Las Vegas—his intro is to do the dance move where they hold hands and do the wave and she loves it.
  5. Rob-Law Student-29-he wanted her to be the Bachelorette
  6. Iggy-excited to be here and meet her and get to know her
  7. Bryce-Firefighter, Orlando- he sweeps her off her feet and holds her in a firefighter position
  8. Will-28, Miami-does a Steve Urkel impression, runs back to the limo to change and becomes Stephon Urkel, which she gets right away and tells him that’s the bit he’s doing
  9. Diggy-31, Chicago-he wants to teach her how to Diggy
  10. Kyle-26, LA- he wants to show her her buns, he brought her food
  11. Blake K-29, San Fran- his grandparents only dated a couple months before they got married and just celebrated 65 wedding anniversary
  12. Brady-29, Male model- he brought a large chunk of ice and a gavel and broke the ice which she enjoyed. The guys now refer to him as Thor
  13. Dean—he met her at the Final rose and is the one who used the “I’m ready to go black and never go back” line and now he’s a little apprehensive about it. She told him she was fine with it and loved the confidence he had.
  14. Eric—he did the same thing as the Final rose and danced with her and she said that’s going to be their thing
  15. DeMario—she tells him that he looks familiar. He agrees and said that it was a pleasure to meet her and he looks forward to many more firsts “first date, first kiss, first Christmas” and she’s all about it. He’s the one who had the tix to Vegas. I liked him, but then he’s getting cocky around the guys and talking about how he’s the Champion and #1 seed in her heart. He’s the one who she’d been warned about not being here for the right reasons, and I could buy that.
  16. Blake E—he brings out a high school marching band and all the guys are able to see it. She loves it. He wanted to drum up a second introduction since he had the awkward first impression on the live show.
  17. Fred, 27, TX- He brings his old yearbook, shows a pic of his 3rd grade photo and Rachel is mortified and knows it’s coming before I put the 2 and 2 together and we see her 8th grade photo. She said she knew exactly who Fred was the second he came outta the limo and that he was a very bad kid.
  18. Jonathan, 31, FL- his profession is tickle-monster and the way he greets her is to have her arms out, close her eyes and he tickles her. She’s a better sport about it, than I would’ve been.
  19. Lee-30, Singer/songwriter- He sings her an original song and gives her a flower an she enjoys it
  20. Alex, 28, MI- He has a vacuum and said he’s actually just with the cleaning crew.
  21. Milton, 31, FL- he takes a polaroid photo of the 2 of them and gives it to her
  22. Adam, 26, TX- he has a lil puppet thing, 2 for the price of 1 and she is freakin out about the puppet.
  23. Matt-32, CT- He’s dressed as a Penguin. Once Penguin meet their soulmates they mate for life. He squeaks as he waddles and she’s laughing.
  24. Grant, 29, NYC- he’s an EMT and comes out in an ambulance with flashing lights and sirens
  25. Anthony, 26, Chicago- he’s here to help her with her sanity.
  26. Jamey, 32, CA- she looks great and her dress is ridiculous
  27. Jack, 31, TX- she looks amazing and he hopes to talk to her more inside
  28. Mohit- the only time he’s going to have the upper hand in the relationship
  29. Jedidiah, 35, GA- he got Biblical with Jacob meeting Rachel
  30. Michael, 26, Chicago- gives her a brownie
  31. Lucas, 30, CA—he has a blow-horn where he introduces himself and his stats, and we get to see her sense of humor come out with this, as she’s able to dish it out and keep him on his toes more than he’s doing for her. He says it’s not about sticking out, but making a connection with her and Waboom!

The other guys think he’s insane an they were trying to figure out who the crazy one is. He comes into the room and you can tell they have no idea what to do with him and don’t know each other well enough to really look at one another for reassurance, so we just to get to see it over all their faces.

Alright, there we go! There’s all 31 of her guys!

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With watching Rachel having her brief conversation with the guys after the initial introductions and the toast, you realize just how articulate she is. The reason why I loved Ben Higgins so much was because he was the most articulate Bachelor we had in our show’s history, and she’s going to be the most articulate Bachelorette I feel like.

Dang, our guy Bryan, the 37 year old Chiropractor who spoke Spanish to her, tells her that he’s here for something serious. Jokes with her by teaching her some Spanish where she says of all the guys here she likes Bryan the most. Then he grabs her and kisses her. She tells the camera that she was not planning on kissing any guys tonight, so she wasn’t prepared for it, but boy did she love it. Rachel is smitten with Bryan and I think he’ll be making at least top 6.

Most of this episode is the same that we see from every premiere. The guys all evidently think this will be the season that’s different and that they will get Rachel’s undivided attention for as long as they want and that they aren’t on a dating show, where other people will be butting in. There are some absolutely ridiculous guys and then there are some guys who I won’t mind having on my screen for a couple months.

Blake, the guy who brought the drum line is now being all holier than thou with Lucas WaBoom guy. Is Lucas there for the right reasons, absolutely not. Should the guy who talked about how much sex he’s gotten and the compliments he gets with his “little general” be the one leading this discussion on night 1! Now Lucas is wanting to stir the pot and get under Blake’s skin and I’m okay watching that, since I’m not a Blake fan.

Rachel grabs the first impression rose and gives it to Bryan. She takes it seriously because she received the first impression rose from Nick, so it means a lot to her. All the guys are now trying to compare themselves to Bryan and how they compete with him. Please notice that he’s quiet and not causing drama in the house fellas!

We have our first rose ceremony now! We have found out that she talked to every single person, which I don’t think is always done and with 31 guys that’s very impressive

  1. Bryan got the first impression rose. I like him and support this decision ๐Ÿ™‚
  2. Peter—first guy outta the limo means something, I’m telling you!
  3. Will—Stephon Urkel bit helped him
  4. Jack—I know he’s a lawyer, but that’s about it
  5. Jamey—he spells his name funny ๐Ÿ™‚
  6. Iggy—this guy is going to be the commentator and tell us what’s going on with the house and the guys, but not be close to Rachel
  7. Eric—they like to dance, ATFR and then tonight
  8. DeMario—of course we’re not gonna listen to people saying he’s not here for the right reasons, we need a villain and I think we found him!
  9. Jonathan—tickle monster made it
  10. Bryce—Firefighter sweeped her off her feet
  11. Alex—he had the vacuum
  12. Kenny—pro wrestler with cutie daughter
  13. Dean—guy who met her at ATFR and has the best smile
  14. Matt—penguin guy, really?!?!
  15. Anthony—he’s tall dark and handsome
  16. Brady—male model who brought the ice chunk
  17. Josiah—-he needs to tone it down around the other guys, but I like him
  18. Lee—Southern gentleman who sings songs
  19. Diggy—he’s got style
  20. Fred—he wasn’t black-balled for camp being a kid, his eyes were all watery though
  21. Adam—guy with the puppet and puppet wasn’t allowed to come up
  22. Blake E—oh good, the guy who’s attempting to guard and protect her heart is here
  23. Lucas—WABOOM, he gets the final rose and yells out his catch-phrase which is just proof he’s a producer pick.

We’re getting rid of 8 guys! I don’t think there’s anyone that I’m really surprised ย about anyone that’s leaving. The sun is shining REALLY bright, so there is some really drunk guys in that room and the ones that are going home! So whenever I see anyone cryin in their going home package, I just blame it on the alcohol.

Looking at the previews, it looks like we’re in for quite a ride. I don’t think Rachel cries nearly as much as Nick & Ben did though, so she’ll get some brownie points for that. It looks like Lee our country boy is the villain, which I never would’ve seen coming. Also, it seems we have a guy who has a girlfriend who he was still living with and she comes on the show so that’s interesting as well.

I’m excited to see where this crazy show will take us!

Until next week,

Lindsay

Nick’s Finale & Rachel’s Beginning?!?

We’ve finally reached the finale of this season!

As you all know, I have not been a huge fan of this season, but we powered through and made it!

I’m not going with my traditional blog, I’m going to warn you, I’m not really going to recap, I’m just going to give random thoughts!

First of all THANK GOD for Nick’s family this should hopefully be the last time we see them! We met them 3 years ago when Nick was first on the Bachelorette with Andi. Do you think they’re grooming Bella to be the first sibling Bachelor/Bachelorette in what 6-8 years when she’s 18-20 years old?!?! Nick may or may not be officially retired from this franchise at this point!

I’m kinda over the whole portion of the family’s coming in and meeting the final 2. Unless they say something controversial, it’s just not as fun. They didn’t pick a clear winner or loser, so I don’t have a whole lot to say. It is exactly what you’d expect.

Don’t worry we’re still in Finland btw for the final dates.

Vanessa gets the first final date. The “fun” portion of their dates is horseback riding to an outhouse where a creepy old guy dressed like Santa is waiting for them:ย giphy1

It went exactly as you’d imagine it went. I didn’t understand, Vanessa acted as if she was thrilled, how much did the Producers give to her to make her say that, and why was he there? I also kept expecting him to come back!

You know that whole sayin about how you should never say it can’t get worse because it then will. Well that’s basically how the rest of the date went, we just kept going downhill. And all they did was talk!

You have Vanessa saying that she should follow her gut and she hasn’t in the past and it’s come back to bite her. But she blatantly tells us (a few more times throughout the episode) that she is ignoring her gut an just going with Nick.

Did I also point out that there was A LOT of crying! At the day portion of the date and the night portion. Nick showed us yet again how he is not Ben and is not eloquent at all. Good job, Nick, you made me miss Ben every single episode this season, I don’t think that’s ever been done before! Nick is not reassuring Vanessa and is blatantly telling her that Raven’s still here and he doesn’t know what his choice is going to be and knows she wants reassurance but he can’t give her that at all because there’s 2 girls here. And I know the premise is not a new one, but the way he’s saying it just seems more cruel than in season’s past. At the night portion of the date, Vanessa is not just crying, she’s sobbing! I mean she’s still gorgeous but that was an ugly cry type of cry, I just wish I looked like her, instead of like this:

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She is still wiping away her tears and is probably going to go back inside and continue her cry when she says goodbye to Nick. Not exactly the way you want the last time you see a girl before you propose to her to go, but that’s just me.

Raven’s date is the complete opposite of Nick & Vanessa’s. Where I don’t remember Nick & Vanessa smiling or laughing together or looking like they’re having fun at all on their date, Raven & Nick can’t stop having fun. There is ice skating, and of course making out on the ice. Our watch party did not think that looked comfortable at all. But then again, they also made out in that mud puddle in Hoxie, Arkansas, so what do I know? They don’t care about the ambiance, or comfort isn’t as important to them as it is to me. Nick also brings out Husky Puppies, come on now, Raven gets puppies and Vanessa got creepy Santa? The night portion is still fun, and they are talking, making out and looking like they genuinely enjoy one another’s company, again a stark contrast to his time with Vanessa.

Then our friend Neil Lane comes in and sees Nick for the 3rd time! They call one another old friend and then Nick makes a joke about how he doesn’t know much about engagement rings. I purposely am saying this was a joke, as he has chosen 3 rings alone with Neil. He’s become like Ross Gellar when it comes to buying rings, and yes I know that’s a joke that has been made all over the internet, and you know what, I rooted more for Ross’ happiness than Nick’s and I bet Ross is not happy to be compared to Nick.

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After Nick picks out the ring, he is now in the place where he will propose to his future bride. Since we’ve noticed with how bundled up they’ve been on all their dates, we are not going to get an outside proposal. No we’re gonna be inside. And not in a cool rustic place like we were when Farmer Chris proposed to Whitney, no we’re going to be in what looks like a showroom living room of a place trying to sell things to people who act as if they hunt wildlife, but never have in their lives, but want to show off to all their friends. There are so many dead animal skins and heads around this room, and rugs that keep curling up and almost tripping people, it’s a mess of a room and basically the last place in the world I would like to get proposed to.

The first girl that’s brought in is Raven….and in the tradition that I HATE the most about this show, they let Raven pour her heart out. This pisses me off more than normal because of Nick being the Bachelor. He has been in this situation 2 times and know how mortifying it is not only in that moment, but for all of America to see it. Why in the hell, did he not stop it?!?! Or why didn’t he go and dump her in her hotel room before she got to this torture chamber? He looks super uncomfortable, but I think Raven is so nervous and so keyed up on finishing her speech that she has tunnel vision and doesn’t notice anything is wrong until she stops.

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Then he starts cryin and talking about how he loves spending time with her an he remembers her coming out of the limo and he was trying to convince himself he loved her, but he realized this morning he wasn’t in love with her….you know all that great stuff people say to other girls 15 minutes before they propose to another girl.

Raven handles herself with such grace! I was really hoping we’d see the girl who threw her stiletto at her ex when she caught him cheating, Nick deserved it and all of America would’ve been on her side! She doesn’t really say a whole lot, hugs him and goes out without her coat (so she didn’t get her man and didn’t get to keep her coat? That’s real a really crappy breakup!) and hugs him again gets in the reject car and then says she doesn’t know if she’ll ever find love or if she deserves it, and I feel sad for her. That is until After the Final Rose, when Chris invites her to Mexico this summer to a place called Paradise and she agrees and thinks she’ll find love there. BTW she really hedged the question on if she thinks Nick & Vanessa will get married. She finally heard the producers all screaming yes, and talked about how maybe church bells could be ringing for them….probably not together, but maybe ๐Ÿ™‚

Alright, Vanessa & Nick, well the first thing about Vanessa’s dress, had us all wondering where in the world she’d been hiding her girls all season? They came out for the finale, and boy did they have to be cold, there wasn’t much covering them. I do have to say that there was a ton of sexual innuendos between Nick & Vanessa throughout this whole episode, and maybe we now know why he chose her?!?!

Nick cries the second Vanessa walks in the door, he starts his speech, she says her part, he proposes, by kneeling WAY far away from her, as if he’s worried she’s going to give him a cold or something and she hysterically breaks down again, can’t look at him and finally says yes. We all think that Vanessa is more in love with the idea of being engaged, then in being engaged to Nick.

The After the Final Rose is as awkward as the whole season. Vanessa talks about how they’ve had their “struggles” and are supposedly these great communicators, why didn’t I ever see proof of this? All of Vanessa’s family is in the audience, how awkward for Nick to see them after he called them all traditional and they’re the opposite of his family. Nick & Vanessa are so romantic, by talking about how they’re realistic and just getting to know one another. They are not talking marriage yet, they are taking baby steps and are optimistic about the future. They are still talking about how they live in opposite countries and are leaning towards the US. The most telling thing, is that they didn’t replay the proposal, we always show the proposal, but not showing it, means they are barely hanging on, I’d have to believe.

They talk about Dancing with the Stars and how Nick will do that, and let’s be honest they are going to follow Farmer Chris & Whitney’s steps. Vanessa will be in the stands rooting him on until he gets kicked off and they will break up and that will be it until Nick comes on our tv screens again.

This couple is not going to be the next Trista and Ryan, but then again, I think we figured that out episode 1 or at the very latest episode 2. I’m happy he didn’t finish in 2nd place and seems happy.

Rachel being on our show and talking about how she’s ready for her story to start and that she’s over Nick, I am again so excited because she’s gorgeous, smart and so freakin articulate. Let’s be honest, she’s going to appear that way compared to Nick, but dang she is so likable! I am actually excited for her season!

They brought the mansion out to Rachel and are going to introduce a couple of her guys to her that will be on this journey with her. She is so freakin adorable because she is not ready for this at all and doesn’t know how to handle the fact that she’s meeting a couple of the guys right now, live on national tv. Harrison knows how to get under her skin, by saying she could meet her husband right here, right now and Rachel’s journey begins right now.

  1. We meet Demario, who’s in a tux and dang he’s adorable. He booked flights for them to Vegas (she loves Vegas) and he had a ring.
  2. Next is Blake, he kisses her hand, she pulls him in for a hug. They’re both nervous, he tells her that she looks good and smells good. Asks her how she’s doing, she tells him to make her more comfortable, he does a side hug and tells everyone to take pix now as their first couple pix.
  3. Dean comes out net and is SOOOO CUTE. He’s ready to go black and never go back. She LOVES that joke, they’re laughing and she hugs him, he doesn’t know where to exit.
  4. Eric from Baltimore comes out, she’s from Texas but they’re here right now. It’s a miracle season, what’s meant to be will be and he’s looking forward to spending time with her and meeting her. She likes what he just said, and they start saying “hey” and dancing on stage and hug it out.

Harrison tells us he’s done this for 15 years and is freaking out on the side stage. Rachel tells us she’d be fine meeting the guys in-front of a live studio audience if she could keep meeting guys like she just did.

Before I officially sign-off for Nick’s season, I would like to go back to my first impression of the girls, based only on their ABC.com profiles and show you how right I was about my favorites:

  1. Kristina—girl from Russia who had such an amazing story
  2. Danielle L- Boobs McGee, I’m still surprised she didn’t make it a couple more weeks
  3. Rachel—the new Bachelorette!!!! That’s a first for me ๐Ÿ™‚

Also for the crazies I’m going to take credit for:

  1. Raven—as much as she grew on me, you gotta admit she’s a little crazy!
  2. Alexis—I called Shark/Dolphin girl, she was the craziest on the whole show ๐Ÿ™‚

My darkhorses and the other crazies I missed on, but I’ll take credit for the ones I did get right!

Well it’s been a ride. I’m glad to say goodbye to Nick and looking forward to Rachel’s season on May 22, is what Chris promised me! So I will see you back here then, or right around then when I make my predictions.

Until then, have the most dramatic/historic Spring ever ๐Ÿ™‚

Lindsay

Nick’s Fantasy Suites Part 2

OMG, we’re less than 2 mins into the show and I absolutely cannot. Of course we had to check-in on Nick & Raven and see how their night went in the fantasy suite. Raven is a happy camper, enough where they have to show a RIDICULOUS montage of her high-fiving people, skipping, building a snow angel and just anything else that would make you feel like:

That montage just tells you the rest of this show isn’t gonna be great if we need filler.

Rachel gets the next date. She’s so excited to see Nick in Finland. They’re doing cross-country skiing, which our girl from Texas has no clue what that means. She slips and falls countless times, but at least she giggles. They end up at a reindeer petting zoo where they feed the reindeers.

They then go into the most romantic place out there, which basically looks like an Outhouse. But it’s a cabin with a fire and hot drinks. Rachel shows she should be a great Bachelorette because she is articulate and able to initiate conversation and explain her emotions.

Her single biggest fear is rejection and that’s something we’re going to hear over and over again next season. That she feels something but it’s not going to be reciprocated. They have an honest to goodness conversation, so of course Nick has to let her go. It’d be an adult real-life relationship and he can’t do that!

They then get on a sleigh that a Reindeer is pulling, and Rachel’s sense of humor cracks me up again because she asks if she should call him St. Nick. He doesn’t like that but I did. Can you also please explain to me, why they need to be on a slay where they lay down?

Now it’s the night portion of the date. Rachel doesn’t have her coat buttoned up and is showing a sliver of her belly, while Nick isn’t wearing a large turtle-neck like Raven, but it is a very high-necked sweater. He really is a baby.

Nick pisses me off because he is telling Rachel to check her ego at the door and tell him what her heart says. He makes her tell him that she’s falling in love with him. They make out and he seems happy for it. He then says he’s falling for her 100% and that’s easy to say. That’s the first time he’s given any sort of indication of how he’s feeling with any girl.

Don’t we all feel like Tom Hanks here? We KNOW she’s not the final 2, so why are we stringing her along? We go to the fantasy suite and we hear Rachel gushing over Nick. Why do I need to see Rachel get her heart broken? I like her already, I want to protect her from anguish and hurt and ABC is going to hurt and embarrass her before they hurt & embarrass her for 3 months on my tv this summer.

Nick makes her breakfast in the morning. Nick likes to see Rachel vulnerable, so she’s so vulnerable, she wears a penguin onsie complete with a hood attached. What’s sexier than that? If that is what’s sexy, I’m thrilled because that is a look I can get down with!

Alright, Vanessa’s time! She hasn’t seen Nick in a week. It’s snowing so it’s fun to see her trying to fun to him. Welcome to Finland, which I feel has to remind her of Canada a little bit here.

What’s more romantic, then Nick & Vanessa jumping into cold water? They then are supposed to run back and forth between the sauna and the cold water. They sit in the sauna in matching swimsuits. Nick is back with his tight ridiculously short shorts. They jump into the cold, then they do run into the sauna. They do this 3 or 4 times and Vanessa is a better sport about it then Nick is as it keeps going on. I’m impressed we don’t see them slip, fall and biff it as they are running back and forth. Believe it or not, they end up in a hot tub, where they’re gonna make out.

Vanessa’s family is very traditional according to Nick and then Nick tells us that Nick isn’t traditional at all. When Vanessa asks for examples, he’s not able to give any other than keep repeating “they are traditional.”

Nick then tells a very interesting story about how his first relationship was with a girl who’s family was very “present” in their relationship and that eventually put a strain on Nick & hers relationship. Soooooooo basically while Nick has said family is very important to him, it’s obviously only on his terms. That’s probably why he likes his family, with as many siblings as he has, he can jump in and out as much as he wants and can come around when he feels like it.

Vanessa’s deal-breakers are she’s not going to compromise her Sunday traditions. She’s not going to give that up. When she’s in Montreal, she will spend 3 hours with her family.

Nick then asks her if she thinks they may be too similar because they are both so stubborn and I could see that. They each want to get their own way.

It’s the night portion of the date and Vanessa points out that their conversations are always very heavy. There’s not really a light-hearted moment when it comes to them. There’s not really a lot of casual laughter.

Vanessa asks about what his “core values” and non-negotiables are. She asks about moving. He says he’s moved a lot, but has never thought about Canada. She gets defensive and asks why. He is embarrassed to admit, but says he’s proud to be an American and how can you not immediately think of this:

And she shoots right back that she’s proud to be a Canadian, and that my friends is what you call a red flag and tells you that these two if they are the final two, will not be together 6 months from now.I feel like Nick feels about Canada just like Barney Stinson does on How I met your mother and I am kinda waiting for Nick to just spit this out:

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What I respect about Vanessa moreso than the other girls, is that she’s making Nick chase and pursue her. She’s challenging him and telling him her terms and what she wants out of a man. Raven & Rachel are saying things they think that Nick wants to hear, and Vanessa doesn’t really care about that,she’s being herself, which is why I think she’ll be the final girl.

Vanessa finally spits out that she loves him. He’s very excited about it and kisses her, they forgo their individual rooms and stay as a couple in the fantasy suite.

We’re ready for the rose ceremony and holy cow, Raven & Vanessa are taking over for Boobs McGee who is no longer here. I am LOVING Rachel’s outfit and hope she wears it again for one of her rose ceremonies.

Nick comes out and starts bawling again. This is a tough decision and thank you all. First rose goes to:

  1. Raven—you knew she’d get the first rose because she’s so easy-going and no drama
  2. Vanessa—not a shocker, unless it’d be the least shocking finale ever.

Nick walks Rachel it looks like to the corner of the room they were just in, but I’m assuming Raven & Vanessa are not in this room. They need a place to have a convo and it’s too cold to have the convo on a bench outside. Rachel is such a classy girl, who says she has no regrets and is glad she told Nick how she feels. She has tears in her eyes, he starts crying and she cries. Nick tells her how amazing she is and how he thinks of it constantly, which is one of the most awkward break-up lines, no?!? He walks her out, they hug it out, she gets in the car, he cries some more.

Rachel’s story of her life is people telling her how amazing she is and how it could’ve been, but then the guy not choosing her. She wants the type of Love that is best described by one of the greatest movies of all times “It Takes Two”

 

Alright, that is how we leave things. With Rachel always the classy one, crying very beautifully in the car hoping to find love some day. Nick is sad, but will bounce back because he has 2 girls waiting for him.

I’m sorry, but I’m not up to blogging about the Women Tell All. It’s going to be lots of fighting, yelling, and girls we can’t remember yelling as loud as they can to attempt to get enough air-time so the Producers may think about putting them on Bachelor in Paradise. It’s also going to be the Taylor/Corrine feud and just the Corrine show in general, and I just can’t.

I’m going to go on a strike blogging about the “Tell all” episode until it goes back to a simpler time, like when Trista was the Bachelorette, way back in 2003:

I hope you enjoy the Women Tell All if you watched it, let me know if I missed anything earth shattering ๐Ÿ™‚ I’m going to rest up for our big finale next week! We got our Country loving Raven, versus our Traditional Canadian Vanessa. Put your bets in now!

Have a great week!
Lindsay

Part 1 of Nick’s Final 3 girls

Welcome back friends!

We start off with Andi & Nick at Nick’s hotel room, where Nick is pouring them whiskey to have this conversation. Nick wants to know why the hell Andi is here and Nick, the answer for that is that Andi still wants to milk her 15 mins for all that it’s worth and hasn’t been on our TV screens for quite awhile and since she was the Bachelorette, I think that means you sell your soul and ABC/Disney/ESPN own you forever and can make you do whatever they want whenever they want.

We go back and forth of Harrison escorting the final 4 girls to the rose ceremony and an awkward conversation between exes.

They talk about how Nick can relate to Andi more, he’s not gonna propose just to the last girl, let’s joke about how we broke up on national tv, but oh wait, now I’m breaking up with girls on tv. Andi asks a conversation that all girls ask their ex boyfriends, “are you planning on sleeping with all 3 girls in the fantasy suite?” She’s acting like she doesn’t know Nick at all, we know the answer. But then Nick plays it all, I don’t know and then for some reason Andi gives him the green light and tells him to sleep with them all. Probably because she doesn’t want to look bad for doing it. We’re pretending that this conversation is giving these 2 exes closure and that they’re friends, I’m not buyin it at all. They both just were waiting until the producers gave them the okay to be able to end the conversation.

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Okay, we’re at the rose ceremony. For some reason we have another freezing cold rose ceremony outside in New York City in the Fall. This makes ZERO sense! The wind also makes it appear that we’re in the middle of a hurricane or tornado!

Roses go to:

  1. Raven—our country girl gets to go to the fantasy suite
  2. Rachel—hmmmmmmm
  3. Vanessa

So Corrine is going home and she immediately starts crying, but also appears as if she’s grinning as she’s crying. She reminds me of my 2.5 month old nephew, who will go from smiling to frowning, or if he’s yawning and his mouth is open he thinks he must be crying and will cry. I actually believe Luke and his tears more than I buy Corrine’s right now.

Nick does a good job of consoling her and this is the first time that I think that Nick is showing that he knows that there’s a huge age/maturity gap between the 2 of them. He’s going to miss the hell outta her, isn’t that what every girl wants to hear? She wishes him luck, hugs him and gets in the reject limo.

In the reject limo she is bawling, but there are NO TEARS coming out of her eyes. These are the fake tears she used on Daddy to get her way. She wants love in a “normal way” and a “normal relationship.” She’s done showing her men how much she loves and worships them she wants guys to do that to her now. Don’t worry her champagne glass is back and empty. This is her audition for Bachelor in Paradise and is just setting it up for her to be the star of the Women Tell All next week.

Also, this just proves that the producers wanted her to stay around until hometowns so we could see how she lived and meet Raquel. There is no connection between her and Nick and there never was, he was somewhat physically attracted to her, but the producers wanted her to stick around, probably because Daddy paid them to, and she went with it.

If you haven’t watched this segment from Jimmy Fallon where he talks about the Bachelor, do yourself a favor and watch it!

My issue is that we know Rachel has to be going home at the end of the fantasy suite dates, because there’s no way in hell they’d do a finale where she’s one of the final 2, or that takes all of the suspense outta the finale.

We’re going from NYC to Finland. So the Bachelor will not be sweating his butt off as he proposes, instead he’ll be freezing his ass off. So a nice change of pace I guess! Something new & different for us ๐Ÿ™‚

We’re looking for LOTS of filler, we see Nick checking in at the airport, we see the cartoon map twice, we see him outside the hotel, we see him walk into the hotel, we see him on the balcony, we see lots of wildlife and then we see him walking across the icy terrain to meet Raven for the first one-on-one date in Finland.

They get in a red helicopter to take off. We hear a voiceover of Raven saying she’s never told anyone she loves them before, which I think is false. I bet she told her ex she loved him before and they just spliced that together to make it appear as if she’s never said she loves him before.

After the helicopter ride they are playing darts in a Finnish pub. Raven feels like this date could be an everyday date…I mean who doesn’t get in the helicopter every day to sight-see and then go and play darts with locals in a pub?

We then have them having a convo and recapping hometowns. We talk about Daddy getting the news about being cancer-free. Raven admits to being a Daddy’s girl and her deal-breaker is if a guy isn’t close to his mom. Nick talks about how he’s always looking for someone opposite of his mom. He needs a girl with edge who will challenge him. He’ll cook because Raven doesn’t cook and she’ll fold laundry because he hates doing that. They figured it out, no Raquel needed! This is a conversation that actually endears Nick to me, because this is him being the least douche version of himself.

Raven’s fears of the night are saying I love you and having sex at the end of the night. What about the fact that he’s going to do the same exact thing with 2 other girls?!? That’d scare me. Evidently we are not going to beat around the bush or try to use euphemism. Raven is just blunt and talks about stuff that shouldn’t be mentioned on national tv. I don’t need to know about what happened behind close doors with her and her ex.

Night portion of the date means we have to see the worst fashion choice Nick has had of the season, which is saying something with all the tiny and tight pants he’s had this season. Nick is wearing a turtle neck. He looks like he refuses to show any skin whatsoever…what makes it even more ridiculous is the fact that Raven is wearing a shirt that has no shoulders. Nick just looks like a wuss now.

We recap the date, we tend to recap a lot with the 2 of them. We talk about playing darts and I actually tune out for a little while.

I’m back when she talks about how she actually didn’t say she loved her ex because she was afraid to say it and didn’t think it was safe. She wasn’t safe because he would hurt her feelings and she knew it. They dated 2 years and she never said I love you and he only did when he was drunk.

Raven needs to finish her wine, and tells him that on their one-on-one and she saw him with his family, she had a comforting feeling and she’s never felt that with another guy. She gets emotional, he gets emotional, and then we bring up Daddy who prayed for Raven to have “an easy love” and after she had time with Nick it was an easy love. She does love him and it would be the worst thing she could do to not tell him. He does seem smitten and he does brighten up when she gives her speech. Maybe he loves her?????

He gives her the fantasy suite card and she talks about how she’s only been with one guy before. She doesn’t pause at all, she accepts. She reminds him that she’s only been with one other person and then gives TMI, enough where Nick blushes so you can imagine what I feel:

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And we’re going to leave on that awkward note. We have 3 hours next week. The next hour of the 2 fantasy suite night and tears as Nick hands out the rose. Then we have the 2 hour Women Tell All, otherwise known as the Corrine show, I’m sure.

Until next week!

Lindsay

Nick’s Hometown Dates!

Hello friends!

We start the episode with us being reminded that Kristina is going home. The girls are freaking out. Corrine is wondering if she’s going to get a hometown, hell yes Corrine you’re getting a hometown, there’s no way the producers got you this far to dangle Raquel in our faces and then not show her to us.

Nick walks in and has roses in his hands and Corrine tells us she can’t tell how many there are….honey can you not count to 4? It’s obvious there are 4 roses, he hands them out and with the rose to Corrine he says he can’t wait to meet Raquel, so we all know where that relationship really stands. We’re shockingly going to have 4 hometown dates, I hope the girls all hugged it out, because from this moment on the girls are isolated and we won’t have them all around one another again.

First hometown is Raven & I end up falling in love with her more, because she pulls up to Nick on a 4 wheeler. She gives him a helmet, he jumps on and is trying to act confident, but you can tell he was not expecting it to go as fast as it did. Raven knows her way around a 4 wheeler. She takes him to a grain bin and they go up the stairs of it because when you want to have an important conversation you need to go up there.

They start climbing up the steps to the grain bin and believe it or not, here comes the sheriff! I’m shocked!

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They “get in trouble” for trespassing. I love Raven though, who’s so angry to be getting thrown under the bus by ABC, and blows the cover by saying “we’re filming” when they ask what they are doing on the grain bin, instead of saying they were gonna talk. Neither have their drivers license or identification. The sheriff then tells Nick that this girl has given him trouble his whole life, because guess what, the sheriff is RAVEN’S BROTHER!

I don’t know if we went up the grain bin or not. We did somehow get Nick another 4 wheeler, and now the 2 of them are going mudding in the fields. We then need to have a water fight and wrestle and make-out in the muddy/watery field. This just proves I’m more of a city girl than a country girl, because as they’re doing this, I’m thinking of mice, snakes and other animals that are surrounding them and all the bug bites I would get. This was not romantic to me. Also, did the producers make her put on a white t-shirt to do this?!? I’ve gone 4 wheeling before, and we did go over muddy hills and things, but I’m pretty sure I wore an old baggy t-shirt or at least a dark colored t-shirt, but then again I’m way more of a prude then any of the girls on a dating reality television show ๐Ÿ™‚

Now we’re going to go to Raven’s parents house. From the outside this is one of my favorite parents houses that we’ve seen in all the years of the show, because this is a NORMAL house! It’s not a mansion, or a castle, it’s a home! We have mom, dad & brother.

Raven was trying to talk to her mom about the prank they pulled on Nick, but mom interupts. She says that dad had a scan while she was gone, Raven gets scared, I hold my breath, and then mom says that daddy is cancer free. I am a nerd because I got goosebumps and a lil choked up. Daddy is emotional, Raven is emotional, mom is emotional, I am emotional.

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Raven tries to give a speech about how inspiring her parents are, she can’t get thru it as she’s cryin, and dad gets up and just gives her a hug in the middle of the speech and I’m so happy. This just makes me so happy, I really love Raven.

Now we have just a conversation with Raven & dad. She said she’s so happy that Nick was here to get the news that dad is cancer free. She said after the tough year, she’s happy they’re turning a corner. She asks dad if it’s weird to think about the fact that he could walk her down the aisle to that guy in there. I fall more in love with dad, because he’s realistic and says it doesn’t matter if it’s Nick or some other guy, he’s glad he’s going to be the one walking her down the aisle, not her brother or uncle. Then Raven gets me all choked up again, because she said there’s no other man besides her dad who’d walk her down the aisle, she’d just walk by herself.

Raven & mom have a conversation now and you can tell that these two have a great relationship. They sit on a bed and have a conversation about how they thought he’d be arrogant, but she is glad she met his sister and his parents and that turned the corner in their relationship. Raven talks about how guarded she is and her mom wants her to open herself up to the experience of loving someone else. Mom reminds Raven that when it’s right the relationship should be easy.

Nick talks to Dad now and asks for permission to marry Raven basically. Raven’s dad said he didn’t expect to like Nick, he’s glad Raven is enjoying herself with Nick. He doesn’t want surprises. He’s not overjoyed with being the son-in-law, but talks about how they trust Raven.

We say goodbye to Raven’s family, but still sit on their front porch. Raven is hesitating as she says “there is no hesitation” to say she’s happy to see how this goes. She can’t say the words “I love you.” She doesn’t want to be rejected or appear to be weak, honey don’t say it, you’re on a hometown date on a DATING show! She’s worried she’s the only one not to say “I love you” I’m going to say you shouldn’t tell someone you love them because you’re the only one who hasn’t, but again, just a simple girl who’s judging from the comfort of my living room, not on a dating show ๐Ÿ™‚

Next hometown takes us to Dallas, TX for Rachel’s hometown! We know she’s not gonna make it to the end, but I wanna meet her family as we will see them again on her season! Nick is dressed very nicely for the daytime portion of their date. We go to church! It’s very important for Rachel, she loves church and it’s a big deal for her. She wants to know if he’ll be comfortable in a church that is predominately black and isn’t a church that he’s used to going to. Nick gets a shout-out at church and they all welcome him.

Nick said that he’s never felt closer to Rachel then in this moment because faith was an important thing in his parent’s relationship and it brought them closer together. I find it odd, because he doesn’t mention how faith is important to him, but I guess if he’s open to it that’s all that really matters. He says he’s comfortable in a place of worship and Amen is Amen.

Okay, timeout for a second here. Can we please point out that Nick says he’s the most comfortable, has the best chemistry, is his true self, and all these other great things about his relationship with Rachel, yet we know HE DOESN’T CHOOSE HER! What happens? I’m thinking it has to be self-sabotage, he’s not really wanting a wife, or he’d choose Rachel.

They are talking about being an inter-racial couple for the first time. This is an interesting conversation, as it is one I’m sure we’ll have more of in the Bachelorette. Rachel doesn’t mind, but a lot of the reason she doesn’t mind is because Nick doesn’t. Which makes sense, if the guy is going to fixate on it, then she will have something to fixate on as well. If they both are united, no big deal.

Rachel’s dad is unfortunately not able to be on camera because he has work obligations. I did see Nick tweet out that he had met Rachel’s dad off-camera.

We are walking up to Rachel’s family’s house. Nick randomly tells Rachel as they are walking up together that she looks great, it is the exact same outfit she’s been wearing all day, so is that just a nervous tic he does, he randomly compliments women.

We’re meeting Rachel’s family which is her mom, older sister, younger sister, cousin, nephew and brother-in-law who is also white, so inter-racial not going to be a huge deal with the family.

Favorite line of the night from Rachel “In this family, you don’t need to have black skin, but you need to have thick skin.”

We’re able to see Nick’s personality actually come out. He’s teasing her and her sisters and I really enjoy it. This is the Nick I wish we could’ve seen more of. We only saw glimpses of him with our Shark-girl Alexis.

Nick and Rachel’s mom are sitting down. He appeases mom by saying that he knows she’s black but he likes her for who she is. Her mom says that is great, but she wants him to be aware that society may have issues with it and is he ready to handle that. She also then asks a great question and asks what are the red flags in their relationship. He tries to say there isn’t anything, and mom ain’t falling for that! He talks about her big personality and is one of the things he loves about her.

Mom & Rachel are now going to talk. I think they get along, but I don’t think they’re as close as Raven & her mom. Rachel’s mom is more skeptical and wants to make sure her baby is smart. I’m very curious how mom feels about her baby being the Bachelorette now. You can tell she loves Rachel, is very intelligent and articulate. She just keeps saying that she trusts Rachel’s judgement, but still seems a lil skeptical (rightfully so!) Rachel tells the camera she’s falling in love with him, but she didn’t tell him that, so 2 girls so far haven’t dropped the “L” bomb.

What we all waited for! Corrine’s hometown in Miami. Corrine wants to take Nick somewhere she’s very comfortable and feels at home—we’re going shopping.

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That my friends, is why I’m all about Rachel and am not a fan of Corrine. Rachel takes us to church…I guess the mall is probably close to Corrine’s place of worship. This shows the immaturity that Corrine has. Even Raven’s date was cool and a part of her and wasn’t so vain.

Corrine enjoys the finer things in life, so we’re going to an exclusive mall. We’re not going to any mall I’ve ever been. Pretty sure “SALE” is a the worst 4 letter word most of these people have ever heard.

All the stores they go in, the people working the store know Corrine by name. Nick’s best quote of the night is “she wants to show me what an ordinary day looks like for Corrine, which is a very un-ordinary day for literally everyone else.” Nick thought he had expensive taste until he met Corrine. They are shopping in places where free champagne is handed out, believe it or not Corrine’s glass is empty very quickly.

Nick put a sweatshirt on that cost $800 and looked like male leggings, and $600 sweatshirt. Nick points out if him & Corrine end up together he will need to get 2 or 3 jobs to keep up. Nick had sticker shock when they’d get to the register and Corrine didn’t blink at all when things were over $3,000. I think all he got for all of that money was a sweater, pants and shoes….that better be all the things he got, i don’t know for sure if he got shoes or socks.

Corrine decides to drop the first “L-bomb” of the night in what looks like a food court. She didn’t sound confident in it at all. He decided to kiss her. She tells us she’s on cloud nine, but I don’t think I believe it.

Corrine’s family is in a high-rise apartment. Corrine’s dad gets on my nerves just by him opening his mouth. We’re meeting Mom, Dad, younger sister and her nanny Raquel! We sit down for dinner and Corrine tattles to Daddy about how the girls used Raquel against her. I’m thinking Daddy may have mob connections and that’s how they have all their money. He wants to know how they found out about Raquel and there are quite a few camera people who are now sweating thinking they may be swimming with the fishes here soon, since they did record Raquel and the cucumbers at the beginning of the season. Corrine let’s them off the hook by saying she told them about Raquel.

Mom interjects that Raquel has been with them for 17 years and is basically a member of the family. My favorite part about that whole sentiment is LITERALLY as she’s saying that, Raquel is serving them! How many of your family members, let you sit down at the table, talk about them and then will bring out different dishes to various members of the family. Please notice they’re all eating something different. Raquel does get a spot at the table, but it looks like a kiddie seat.

Dad & Raquel sit down to talk first. They take their goblets of wine. Corrine tells dad that she told Nick that she loves him today after a month and a half of dating (she doesn’t tell dad they have never had a one-on-one date).

We randomly get Nick & Raquel having a conversation. I think we just needed Raquel to have more screen time. Believe it or not, Raquel sticks with the company line of if Corrine is happy, she’s happy.

Dad wants Corrine to think of worst case scenario. If Nick is the stay at home dad, because Corrine has her multi-million dollar company to run, can she handle being the bread winner? Can Nick have a job that will be able to raise a family and keep Corrine happy? She says yes, I think even Nick can agree that no he can’t afford a job that will keep Corrine used to her life that she’s grown accustomed to.

Corrine and her mom have some weird tension between the 2 of them. I get this vibe from her mom:

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I want to know about her sister. How old is she? Is she going to also run a multi-million dollar company? Did dad & Corrine talk about how business is going? I hope her sister is normal, she looks normal! I guess those questions are just going to have to be things I ponder, I’m not going to get my answers to them right away.

We’re in Montreal for Vanessa’s hometown date. We get to meet Vanessa’s students. All of her students are special needs over 21 and are both French & English. There is a big crowd waiting for her and they are all so excited to see her, they all start crying to see her and Nick gets emotional just watching them. Vanessa shows off her teaching skills and has her students help them make a scrapbook.

I’m sorry, another rant, but COME ON Nick!!! How can you have a moment or an afternoon like this with Vanessa and compare it at all to the superficial day that you had with Corrine? This made me appreciate Vanessa so much more.

Vanessa’s parents are divorced, and she wants him to know what it’s like to split his time between 2 divorced parents. I like this approach because that is real life. How many times have we brought the divorced parents together for one hometown date and you can tell they never hang out and it’s the most awkward thing ever.

We’re going to Mom’s side first. Vanessa is giving him the run-down on names. We have 15 loud Italians in a room together. When Vanessa walks in the room she immediately starts crying. She said she’ll be interested to see how he can handle a lot of people, considering he has what 10 siblings, he should be able to handle this. If not, then he must not be very close to his family. The family wants to know what are their plans for after the show? Are they going to get married? What city are they going to live in? That’s when this really shows that these relationships aren’t as far along as other seasons of the Bachelor, huh maybe Nick should do more talking with his mouth instead of making out with it.

Vanessa’s mom wants to know what is it that made Vanessa stand out to Nick. And Vanessa’s mom calls him out for the first thing that he points out is her attractiveness, she doesn’t want to talk about her looks. Older sister points out they need to have a conversation about where they’re going to live. Older sister also wins some big sister brownie points from me, because she threatens him if he breaks her heart, she’ll break him!

Vanessa’s family is very loving and protective of her. They do not seem so supportive of her even being on this show and are moreso even more skeptical of it then any of the other families. They want her to know that she’ll be fine and she’s strong. They want her to be happy and not to be heart-broken. You cannot deny that there is real love and devotion from this family. This was a very genuine and real family visit. Something that I think we felt from all of the hometowns with the exception of Corrine’s.

We then go to Vanessa’s dad side of the family. We get a rundown of the show and all the locations they’ve traveled. There’s been good times and hard times, but the good outweighs the bad. Ironically Vanessa’s dad asked the exact same question as the mom. He points out that he wants them to respect one another and for his daughter to be happy. Vanessa’s dad cannot give Nick his blessing to get engaged because there are still 3 other women in the picture. He asks Nick if he asked the other families for their permission and he tries to weasel out of it by saying that he in a way asked the other families their permissions. Vanessa’s dad is giving Nick the business and I appreciate it. He’s forcing this back on Nick and asking him what this means to him. I respect Vanessa’s dad by saying he can’t give permission until he knows that his daughter is the last one and wants her to not get hurt and to be happy and then he concedes and gives his blessing. Vanessa has a random talk with her step-mom I believe, it was awkward and the 2 don’t seem super close.

Vanessa’s dad tells her that he gave his blessing and Vanessa is super excited that Nick asked for his blessing. She tells dad that if he asked she’d say yes right now. Then Vanessa asks dad if he asked Nick if he asked that question to other girls and then is very upset when dad says that yes, he did ask and Nick asked everyone’s permission for their blessing, so sorry Vanessa you are just like the rest of the pack, you aren’t special like you think you are.

We are randomly in New York for the rose ceremony after hometowns. I’m confused why we’re in New York, but I guess why not?!? Nick thinks it’s going to be impossible to make a decision tonight on who to send home. Corrine is feeling really confident because they laughed, kissed, giggled and she bought him a nice outfit. Rachel & Raven are both freaking out because they didn’t tell him that they loved him. We have WAY TOO MANY balcony shots! We saw all the girls pondering life on the balconies and then Nick on the balcony. Vanessa is in tears because she’s tired of being on a dating show and not knowing exactly where Nick stands and how he feels.

There’s a knock on his door and I expect it to be Vanessa, but it’s Andi! And then comes up the words “TO BE CONTINUED”

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